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A man walked into a bar... Ouch
Doctor Doctor I feel like a pack of cards!
Sit down and I'll deal with you later.
Whats the address of Scotland Yard?
999 Lettsby Avenue
Definition of Adamant.... The first male insect
Would it be a paradox if you gave up Christianity for Lent?
A cannibal went to his witch doctor complaining of an upset stomach, so the witch doctor asked him what he had eaten recently.
"Well, we caught this missionary and we boiled him and ate him for dinner last night."
Witch doctor said "That shouldn't do it. You'll have to tell me more."
"Well...he was walking along the beach...he was a tall man in a long brown robe..."
And the witch doctor said " Well that's it you idiot. You boiled him and he was a friar."
the center cannot hold
These are really funny, its made me laugh quite a few,
The only ones I can think of is
How was the grand canyon formed?
A scotsman lost a tenner down a rabbit hole (i got this from my dad who is scottish)
Falling down a slippery slope
and all the while I'm losing hope,
the will and strength just to cope.
Glad to know it and thanks for letting me know.
So long as this you fail to see:
That death precedes re-birth!
A gloomy guest you’ll always be,
Upon this darkling Earth.
‘The Soul's Yearning'
Goethe
‘The Random Jottings of a Stargazer’
www.raysofwisdom.com
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
So long as this you fail to see:
That death precedes re-birth!
A gloomy guest you’ll always be,
Upon this darkling Earth.
‘The Soul's Yearning'
Goethe
‘The Random Jottings of a Stargazer’
www.raysofwisdom.com
I was dating a girl in a wheelchair... But she broke up with me because I stood her up.
Da dum Tsh!
Two hats were hanging on a rack in the hallway. One said to the other: ‘You stay here, while I go on a head.
So long as this you fail to see:
That death precedes re-birth!
A gloomy guest you’ll always be,
Upon this darkling Earth.
‘The Soul's Yearning'
Goethe
‘The Random Jottings of a Stargazer’
www.raysofwisdom.com
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
So long as this you fail to see:
That death precedes re-birth!
A gloomy guest you’ll always be,
Upon this darkling Earth.
‘The Soul's Yearning'
Goethe
‘The Random Jottings of a Stargazer’
www.raysofwisdom.com
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
So long as this you fail to see:
That death precedes re-birth!
A gloomy guest you’ll always be,
Upon this darkling Earth.
‘The Soul's Yearning'
Goethe
‘The Random Jottings of a Stargazer’
www.raysofwisdom.com
Thanx for the puns. Here's some new ones.
What parachute doesn't open when you jump out of a plane?
A perishute.
What city is bad for your teeth?
Nashville
What's the scientifc name for snot?
Snottus snottus.
What's the name of a vegetable running for office?
Cucumbent.
Last edited by pit; 1st January 2013 at 12:59 AM.
If I'm a Nobody, it's only because society has made it too Goddamn Stressful to be a Somebody. - Me
Reality bites. - Winona Ryder
"Ye who suffer, suffer from yourselves. No one else compels." Fuck that.
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