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Thread: Choosing Forgiveness

  1. #1
    Senior Member Tim.'s Avatar
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    Choosing Forgiveness

    Choosing Forgiveness: Your Journey To Freedom
    by Nancy Leigh DeMoss
    available at Amazon.com

    "Choosing Forgiveness" is a book encouraging forgiveness written from a Christian Perspective. I wasn't aware of that last part when I picked up the book from the library. Christian ideology is the dominant theme of the book in my mind, and therefore makes it a very difficult read if you are not Christian. While I appreciate the role of forgiveness in Christianity and believe there is a lot of wisdom to be found in the Bible, I thought it was too much for me in this book.

    In terms of information on forgiveness, the bulk of the book is dedicated to convincing the reader that they should, as the title suggests, choose to forgive people that have wronged them. This is done largely through short stories of people that have experienced terrible suffering and chosen to forgive the people responsible, and the description of the positive effects resulting from that decision. The stories are indeed touching and emotional. There is also some material describing what forgiveness is and isn't.

    To me, the most interesting discussion points in the book are: 1) forgiving someone does not necessarily mean you will feel better; 2) we don't and shouldn't necessarily forget when we forgive; and 3) forgiveness does not have to be a process, and if it is it is one that should actually be finished. I found myself wishing that there had been more and more detailed information on these types of topics rather than some of the other material.

    I do not think this book is worth the read for most people. I don't think the advice in the book is bad, but there are many books available on this topic. If you are a Christian and you are looking for help with forgiveness relating to a specific problem/relationship, then perhaps this is an okay choice assuming you haven't heard of anything better.
    Fiat justitia ruat caelum

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    SF Friend total eclipse's Avatar
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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    Thanks for the info i myself don't think i could forgive just not in me i guess although i understand why they say it is necessary

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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    Would you find it in UK libaries?

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    Senior Member Tim.'s Avatar
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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    Quote Originally Posted by Cute_Angel_Xx View Post
    Would you find it in UK libaries?
    Good question. And the answer is that I have no idea! My gut tells me that you'd be unlikely to find it in libraries in the UK, but I'm not really sure.
    Fiat justitia ruat caelum

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    Senior Member Chargette's Avatar
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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    I wonder if not being able to forgive is continuing to be the victim.

    What do you think?
    I have attempted suicide twice. Since I have to live, I don't do strong anymore. I ask God to be my strength because He succeeds where I cannot. -- Chargette

    "So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God." Romans 10:17

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    Senior Member Tim.'s Avatar
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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    Quote Originally Posted by Chargette View Post
    I wonder if not being able to forgive is continuing to be the victim.

    What do you think?
    Personally, I think every case is different. Sometimes we probably get a kick out of the righteous anger or feeling better than someone. Sometimes it's probably just really painful and it might not seem possible to forgive.

    But I also think that it usually does more damage to ourselves when we are unable to forgive someone than it does to them.

    I'm still thinking about a lot of this stuff myself, and I can't say that I've formed a real solid understanding of everything involved.
    Fiat justitia ruat caelum

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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    When my mom was dying I had a hard time forgiving her for abandoning me when I was a kid, and for the abuse. I havent forgave the man that abused me, which was her boyfriend.I have chose to try to forgive people, i am not sure if I really have.

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    Senior Member IV2010's Avatar
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    Re: Choosing Forgiveness

    I was always too forgiving but struggle more with it as i get older.
    there are some on my "no forgivness'' list

    thanks for sharing Tim

    My fave saying about forgivness..

    To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.

    If only it were that easy!
    My life goes on without me!!

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