Well, sometime within the next week is going to be the anniversary... of my first serious contemplation of suicide. Since then, my life has become more isolated and lonely. What the hell am I clinging to? Hope for the future, of course... Time and again I got my hopes up for something. I hoped my life would improve. Time and again I was let down. Benjamin Franklin's definition of insanity is trying the same thing again expecting a different result. I think that's a better definition of stupidity... So I'm a fucking idiot for hoping it'll change. I hope I get the balls to do it, soon.