Decided to give a 10 week update. First approximately 10 weeks ago I tried to kill my self several times but quit 1/2 way through. I started taking prozac about then as well. Where am I now. Well if 0 is attempting to kill yourself and 10 is no depression what's soever. Most of the time these days I am a 9 with scattered 10. What has changed? A couple things: 1. I made changes in my life that I could and they have helped. 2. I am taking prozac. 3. I learned all about my depression type. I am a ruminater of tragic events that changed my life 30 years ago. When I ruminate I remember them as if it happened yesterday. I found this website called: http://www.clinical-depression.co.uk/depression-learning-path/ I did the FREE part. The depression learning path. It was right on target for me. So now I fight ruminating. It's a battle. But I want to ruminate to try and fix things, change things. And that's the problem. I learned on the above website, rumination lead to deeper and deeper depression. No why do I ruminate? Because I have some current serious life issue I need to tackle. Instead I try to ruminate on what could have been, "if only", and I would not be in this positions. What I really need to do, and I am now trying. is continue to fight. That is what I am now trying to do. So hopefully between the prozac and fighting rumination I will be able to go forward.