I'm giving up. I promised I wouldn't but I'm not sure I can keep it. I'm just so tired of pretending to be happy and optimistic and normal and faithful. Nothing seems to work. I see no hope for the future.
I'm doing better now. I just had an episode last night that's it. I went to KCCC (a christian crusade) hoping to feel something, to be radically changed but nothing happened. I guess my expectations were too high. To add to that I have a stalker, my grades are falling, blah blah blah and all that shit.