Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Ilak, Nov 3, 2014.

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  1. Ilak

    Ilak Member

    After 30 years of suicidal thoughts, why am i still here? I'm so tired of living.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hello.....30 years of suicidal thoughts? Cannot even begin to imagine what you have been living through. What has kept you here, maybe what has kept you here is key to finding a solution to the recurring thoughts?

    Are/have you been seeing a professional?

    Also want to say I am so sorry this has happened to you. :(
  3. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    30 years is quite a long time it's the part of you that wants to live
  4. Ilak

    Ilak Member

    It's not that I want to live. It's that I'm too cowardly to do anything about it. That's what keeps me going. Cowardice.

    ...still here.
  5. denise_c

    denise_c Active Member

    You're too harsh with yourself to be true! It is not too late to discover what keeps you alive. Maybe what you call cowardice has deeper roots in yourself. Roots of mental strenght, love or even a lust for life. We are contradictory beings, and you must be one too.
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