I am going to kill myself. There s no point bothering with this life, there is no way I can make amends, I have screwed it up so badly, I need a new start. Just had to tell someone, I am not gonna tell my friends, cos I do not want to put any pressure on anyone and I dont want people to think I am seeking attention. All I was seeking was forgiveness. But I am never gonna get that. Life is only gonna get worse, and besides I cannot live with myself, I cant really hurt my family, but if I end my life now, they will be able to move on eventually, but if I stick around, I will keep making people miserable. I am not sure why I am posting this, but it kind of makes me feel better to know somebody is reading this and that I am not just talking to myself, cos I am sick of talking to myself.