Don't bother to read this, there's no point I'm tired of life, tired of the anger, sick of the bullshit so many people come out with. I feel like the one sane person in a world full of raving lunatics. I'm not who I used to be, "mal" is gone, he's like a character in a book I've written whom I now long to kill off. I don't know who's here now, but they're tired of it all. I just wish I didn't care about anyone, then it would be easy to go. To the people I used to talk to, thank you, honestly. But it feels like someone else's memories. I wish I could find a point to life. I wish I'd never come to sf so I wouldn't have hurt so many good people. I've wasted my life, so I'll put it back in the pot for someone else to have.