:(

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Hae-Gi, Feb 29, 2008.

  1. Hae-Gi

    Hae-Gi Banned Member

    It'll be better, tomorrow, at least, since I will be alone, so I can have some vodka to get drunk with...

    I don't feel like writing anything more than that... I've said what needs to be said in my old posts... which is enough if you've read them, and remember them, anyway.

    I was feeling better for like a week... but it's gone away, now. Was going to do something more for my apartment, too, but I never managed to build up enough energy.

    I'm almost sure, now, that I have caries, but I can't go to a dentist, due to my filth consideration... what am I supposed to do?

    I wish I had some good drugs to drug myself with, but all the good ones are illegal, and the crappy ones are hard to get, as well, since you need to meet an arrogant, disgusting psychiatrist. Illegal drugs are filthy, as well, and far worse; handled by serious crooks; so I can't use that, every now and then, to be happier... also, they are addictive...

    I am so depressed... I should let it get into my head that I won't ever find my one and only girl. As such, I shouldn't live. It's no use to live without being with your true love, and having sex, constantly, under true love. That's the only reason to live... a close to unthinkably good reason,though... how happy I would be, then. But it won't happen. I will be alone for a few more years, then I will end my life. That's what's going to happen...
     
  2. taranama

    taranama Well-Known Member

    i know what you mean. i feel like i'll always be alone. but thats because i'm not the best i can be right now. cutting the hell outa my arms isn't gonna attract someone. being all depressive and self pitying, and moody and snappy. i know that now. i hate this world sometimes. but know what helps? and its gonna sound so stupid and corny. bob marley. 3 little birds.

    Don't worry about a thing,
    cause every little thing gonna be all right.
    Singin'; don't worry about a thing,
    cause every little thing gonna be all right!

    Rise up this mornin',
    Smiled with the risin' sun,
    Three little birds
    Pitch by my doorstep
    Singin' sweet songs
    Of melodies pure and true,
    Sayin'; (this is my message to you-ou-ou)

    listen to the birds in the morning and things will be a little brighter.
    i'm on msn if you want to chat.
     
  3. Hae-Gi

    Hae-Gi Banned Member

    Music doesn't really cheer me up, anymore... my depression has gone too far. The few kinds of music that is able to cheer me up, a little, at times, must be without lyrics, too.

    I don't have a working computer, by the way, so I can't talk with anyone, unless they'd be prepared to MMS or SMS me. I just am not getting my computer to work... I refuse to get a laptop, too... although many of the parts for my computer have become old, one part of the computer is seriously expensive (still, even), so I must use it (want to, as well). Also, I don't like laptops, and worse, still; you are forced to get them with Windows. I will never pay anything to that disgusting company Microsoft.

    If you wonder how I'm able to post without a computer, I'm doing it with my mobile.
     
  4. taranama

    taranama Well-Known Member

    i'd SMS you in a heartbeat, but i've no credit :mad: damn it! well, i can chat anytime here if you want that.
     
  5. Hae-Gi

    Hae-Gi Banned Member

    I really do need to die.

    In the evening, when I'm alone, I'm definitely getting drunk. When I live in my apartment, I will get drunk whenever I feel like it, though... I will, most likely, become an alcoholic... this despite me always having sworn not to become one... but after I first became drunk, a few years ago, I've just not been so sure, anymore...