40 Things That Movies Have Taught Us

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Godsdrummer, Mar 11, 2010.

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  1. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people--whether they are employed or not.
    2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
    3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.
    4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.
    5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
    6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
    7. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
    8. Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.
    9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
    10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
    11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
    12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
    13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off--even while scuba diving.
    14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
    15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
    16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
    17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
    18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
    19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
    20. Computer monitors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: "Enter Password Now."
    21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
    22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
    23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
    24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.
    25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
    26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.
    27. You can fire 6,000 rounds out of an Uzi with a twenty round clip.

    28. All ropes will slide back and forth against an sharp edge and break if a person is using that rope to climb very high off the ground.

    29. When a woman first wakes up in the morning, her hair and makeup are perfect-- even her lipstick

    30. When a couple first wake up in the morning, they immediately want to smooch and make out, and nobody ever has "morning breath."

    31. Once in the clutches of the arch nemesis, the hero and the unassuming lady (who just somehow got caught up in the action), are given very chic, perfectly fitting outfits so that they can look smashingly glamorous when they meet their intended demise.

    32. Locks repel keys when you are in a hurry.

    33. All bombers use the universal wire color coding system for wiring their device.

    34. To be a truly effective villain, you must also be the president of a mulit-national conglomerate that makes very useful household items.

    35. Do not under any circumstances wear the red shirt on any episode/movie of Star Trek.

    36. All land developers don't develop land because there is an economic need for developed land, they develop land so they can violate sacred land, or destroy natural scenery, or simply to run someone of a piece of land.

    37. In the event of a tornado, merely tie yourself to a pipe with any thin piece of leather and you will be ok!

    38. Young witches are usually cute and blonde.

    39. People die immediately from stab wounds

    and finally...
    40. All space suits have lights inside the helmets for very good reasons which are unlikely to become clear at this moment.
  2. Beautiful Disaster

    Beautiful Disaster Forum Buddy SF Supporter

    hahaha it made me giggle

    thanks :D
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    That made me laugh. Nice!
  4. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    - A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, there were Jedis fighting the evil Sith.

    - When a psycho is after you, always run upstair.

    - When you find out your cell phone is out of coverage zone, that's when shit happens.

    - We live in the Matrix

    - Bad guys can't shoot for shit.... despite having unlimited ammo

    - Aliens better not mess with the USA

    - In movies, people don't need to poop
  5. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    - In movies, people don't need to poop

  6. Right U R Ken

    Right U R Ken Well-Known Member

    Actually this one is true. Watch Mythbusters, and then watch the reruns. It's a great show.
  7. Little_me

    Little_me Well-Known Member

  8. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    that was fun thanks....
  9. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Heh, I love these kind of lists.

    "17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds."

    I think that has to do with adrediline (I don't think I'm spelling it right...). You don't really feel pain during the fight because of it, but once the fight is over and it wears off, it hurts like hell.

    My mom was in a fight when she was younger and had a broken nose. She says it only started hurting while she was walking back home.
  10. Isabel

    Isabel Staff Alumni

    and the hero always know how to drive the handy motocycle, truck, choppers ... conveniently found on his way to save the day.
  11. friendless

    friendless Well-Known Member

    -you will be killed by a homicidal maniac if you leave the party to make-out.
  12. Addy

    Addy Well-Known Member

    movies are make believe, they are not real.... oh and most importantly there is no such thing as 'happily ever after'
  13. friendless

    friendless Well-Known Member

    -Just when you think the psycho killer is dead, he will try to grab you one last time!
  14. flyingdutchmen

    flyingdutchmen Well-Known Member

    spoiler :lol!:
  15. friendless

    friendless Well-Known Member

    -The closer a killer gets to you the more likely you are to trip!
  16. chrs75

    chrs75 Well-Known Member

    - Bad guys can't shoot for shit.... despite having unlimited ammo

    lol i like this one

    -If "Eye of Tiger" is playing, anything is possible

    -When your in a building and you hear gunfire, always make sure you've got shoes on
  17. PerfectlyMurdered

    PerfectlyMurdered Well-Known Member

    Ahaha! These were my favorites. Made me laugh :)
  18. frager84

    frager84 Well-Known Member

    -when loved ones get bitten they should no longer be loved
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