5 months

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by psycho8, Feb 23, 2008.

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  1. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    it's 5 months now from my first cut, i've cut a few times since, the last time was only a few days ago, they're still quite small but i've started to think about it nearly all the time and sometimes i see myself slicing into my arm with a knife and blood trickling down. I know the cuts are small now and i olny use a tiny blade but i get the feeling that it means that they'll end up getting much bigger like in the image...

    i don't know if that made much sense:blink:
     
  2. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    i kno exactly wot u goin through. wen i started (regularly) it was small things then it became more serious! if i were u (i.e. had a second chance) then i'd find out y i do it and find another way of coping. btw y do u do it? (u have 2 answer) if u wanna tlk i'm here (along with every1 else).

    gud luck
     
  3. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    i think i do it because my life seems to be out of control and i just want to feel in control of something
    i tend to get cravings for it when i'm annoyed
     
  4. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    cuttin 4 most is a way of gainin control in a part of their life. is it wen u get annoyed bout a certain subject? coz with me its a particular subject tht sets it off (though others can). i'm guessin u didnt want 2 say y u do it, which is fine i dont reveal my reason. wot aspects of ur life r out of control? wot do u do? (i.e. job, student??) i find it really hard 2 control my self harm. but as a result i am really self consicous tht people might c the scars, which can also (4 me) trigger me 2 do it more. u c, 1 thing i learnt is its a vicious circle!

    make a list, mentally or written, bout all the things u control in ur life (even petty things). and also make a list of wot is out of ur hands, but only things tht directly affect u (i.e. not world hunger, rather no girlfriend). then with the no conrol list think of diff ways of solving each seperate thing, i.e. if no girlfriend aim 2 tlk 2 at least 1 every night u go out or sign up 2 datin site.

    I think tht might help u. again if u wanna tlk just post or PM me, i'm on most days.

    D.T
     
  5. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    It's when i'm annoyed at family...they've always seemed to care too much...so i end up feeling smothered...they think they still 'know' me but they don't anymore


    It would be a good idea to make a list but there are things in my life that there is no way i can solve and they are the important ones
     
  6. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    i've cut myself again just now

    i think it's a bit deeper than my previous cuts because it bled more
     
  7. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    its freaky! wot ur writing is like wot its like 4 me. lol. anyways, i'm slightly older than u and in sept 2006 i started uni. best thing tht happened 2 me! i moved 2 a uni 400miles away, not consciously tryin 2 get away at the time. and now i live in a student house, with no family for hundreds of miles :yeah:
    u just have 2 try and hold on till ur old enough, and ready, 2 move out. till then try 2 do things 2 get out of the house, mayb hang with friends or, wot i did, go 4 walks. and wen ur in the house dont completely ignore family, it doesnt work coz then they get 'worried' and u get more pissed at them, but instead keep convo's short with them. if u keep them short then hopefully the amount of prying q's will drop.

    hope this helps

    D.T
     
  8. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    it's more that they keep nagging me about stuff, like revision and just now because when i called up my mate earlier today because i didn't say 'Please could i speak to...' i just said, 'could i speak to...' for f's sake...i just really don't care right now
     
  9. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    its hard wen they're always watching u, eagle eyed! have u tried tlkin 2 them about backing off a bit?? it'll b hard 2 approach them about it i kno, and i guess even harder 2 stay calm if an argument breaks out. but if u can tlk 2 them then they might back off a bit. though u'll get 'we do it coz we love u', just b strong but not aggressive. apart from tht i dont think i can help u any more with the causes. but try 2 avoid cuttin urself, its not gud if u get addicted (which is easier than u think). have u tried anything else apart from SI? though SI covers a lot. but if u have 2 cut then please b careful. have tissues ready 4 da blood and if u cut deep put pressure on the wound 4 idelly 10mins, then put a plaster (band-aid if in usa) or something on it. change the dressing bout everyday, or if saturated with blood. keep the wound clean until it has healed! and dont pick at the scabs, it slows down healing can cause infection and makes worse scars. there is a thread on scar reduction and treatment of cuts, try reading them.

    remember tht by cutting urself u solve the there-and-now but u will have a permanent scar 4 ever, which will remind u of wot u use 2 do! its not nice.

    D.T
     
  10. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    it's stinging so much now i can't move my arm or it'll sting more, i have to focus on this to take my mind off it:sad:
     
  11. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    i kno its the actual pain tht feels good (even though it can hurt). have u treated it? or r u just watchin the blood run?
     
  12. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    thanks:smile:

    but i don't like using plasters because last time i used one i got a reaction to it, there was rash and it made it itch really badly:mellow:
     
  13. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    i've was holding tissue against it to stop it bleeding, which it has now, it just stings
     
  14. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    the cuts are too small for the blood to run
     
  15. Deep Thought

    Deep Thought Well-Known Member

    if u cant use plasters then use some gauze and medical tape. u can pick both up at a chemist or supermarket easily. if u dont have either then go get some, but in mean time do a bodge-job! get a clean tissue and tape it 2 ur arm (this is only a temporary method). small cuts will, obviously, heal faster but nevertheless u still nd 2 treat them.

    remember if u want 2 tlk about anything i'm here

    D.T
     
  16. psycho8

    psycho8 Well-Known Member

    thanks:smile:
     
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