6 days to go. Chapter 2

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#1
Chapter 2:

What do you do when you stop feeling, when you stop caring, when you stop crying because there is nothing left within you. You feel numb, you long for someone to hold you tight and take away the pain from you, but what happens when that someone comes along and holds you tight but the pain remains, when you cannot feel anything becuase you are so empty that there s nothing left inside you, not even pain left to release.

There is no more anger, no more pain, no more feeling depressed ...simply feeling empty....you find yourself in a pit where there is nothing to live for, nothing that will ignite that spark inside you, not even frustration, no feelings left, nothing.

If you still find tears to cry inside you, anger that makes you scream, pain that makes you ache, frustration that keeps you awake..then you STILL HAVE THE CHANCE TO CHAGE YOUR SITUATION .......ask for help, run towards your love ones, allow yourself to cry on their shoulders, scream your anger to the world, stay in a friend's place and tell them how you feel ...
REMEMBER ...if you still have feelings ...there is a chance for you...Dont let your depression / anger / pain become emptyness ...like what happened to me ..because then there will be no hope
 

Hazel

SF & Antiquitie's Friend
Staff Alumni
#2
I have been in a similar place to where you are right now, I totally understand what you are saying. Are you having any professional help, if not then I implore you to get some as a matter of urgency.
Please don't dismiss it without at least trying it first.

If you would like to chat, please pm me.

:hug: Hazel x
 
#3
Hi Hazel

Thank u for your reply, I have spoken to many people professionals / friends and ex - partner. None of them have being able to help, on the contrary they have turned their back on me, even though I was very clear about my feelings.

In 6 days time I will travel overseas, I dont think I will come back , I no longer feel anything, but I am happy I was able to help a couple of people in this website who r not lonegr suicidal, so I am hoping my story will raise awarness and will make others realise that ist not too late for them ...if they reach out to the right people ..

Enrique
 
#5
Honestly I did try ..I reached out and I got people turning their back on me ...

sometimes you rty over and over again, but you never seen to get a break, so eventually your spirit is broken ..then you just start drifting ..and sometimes you drift too far into the darkest part of your mind ...and you get caught in a blackhole...and theres no way out from there, but u can still send a last minute msg and manage to save others ...so it wasnt a total waste of time
 

Hazel

SF & Antiquitie's Friend
Staff Alumni
#6
Have you ever been admitted to hospital Enrique?
I've been in the black hole you describe, I believe when you arrive at that place, total rest in hospital coupled with therapy is what you need. It worked for me, was such a relief to have all responsibility removed from my shoulders..... is it worth considering?
 
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