8 four leaf clovers later...

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Lady Byron, Aug 16, 2006.

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  1. Lady Byron

    Lady Byron Well-Known Member

    Two days ago, I could have died. There was a rattlesnake right by the door in our backyard. Well, I had taken a shower and gotten dressed. I then looked out the window and saw my dog Kody sitting by the door and staring at something... I being my usual dumbass (excuse my french) self, decided to open the door. I heard the rattling and happened to look to the right of the door (where my dog was staring) and there was a rattlesnake about 5 inches away from my foot. My brother pulled me inside and called me a bunch of names I cannot say and called my dad, all while slamming the door shut :blink: . My brother and my dad ended up killing the poor snake and asked me why I hadn't moved a lot faster. I couldn't tell them my actual intentions. It would have been perfect. I kind of regret feeling the way I did. I had actually wished the rattlesnake would have gotten to me before my brother got to me. What was really weird though, was that while I was in the shower, I had been thinking about an e-mail someone had sent me a few weeks earlier about being careful and being thankful for being alive because we could end up dying tonight or something and I said to myself in the shower," Yeah... Right... I wake up EVERYDAY and wish that I was dead... My wishes never come true... Damn..." and I kind of shrugged it off. Then the incident happened. Also, my cousin thinks it's cool to cut herself. She does it and shows her "friends." She's like, "OMG Paige, look what I did last night. Yeah it's because of my bitchy cousin." God, I wish my cousin would go away... She actually cuts herself for attention. She wants to be "Punk, emo and gothic." URGH!!!! SHE PISSES ME OFF!!!!!!! I hate her so much... but nobody understands... What I hate too is when she tells me, "Oh, you're so pretty, I wish I could look like you." and then behind my back she tells people I'm ugly and slutty and crap... Yeah, at least I'm still a virgin... I can't believe she calls me slutty... well, I just had to get that crap off my chest. Ahhh, I feel much better.... and then she calls my name.... :blink: :mad: :dry: Fudge!!!
     
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