its been a while since i self harmed, but today has heightened my need for it. i tried hard to fight it and kept myself occupied but the thoughts took over and now i am at peace with my decision to go deeper and deeper, till the life literally drains away. i will never be at peace, even now im done so i may as well stop the pain permanantly. i have taken the blame for how my life has turned out, i didnt try hard enough to beat my demons, i just rolled over and let it win. i was nothing more than a pain in the arse to every person that had the unfortunate displeasure of knowing me. sorry just doesnt justify what ive done.