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Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by »broken_smile«, Aug 5, 2011.

  1. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    my fucking mother keeps talking about me to my father... i swear i wanna strangle her!!!!! my father is abuse towards my mother since i exist and nooooooooo for her i have no reasons to be a freak!!! and the fucking DUMBASS keeps telling everything i say/do to him!!! like this last time i did the FUCKING MISTAKE of telling i went to a fucking psychologist years ago when i was fighting with my sis (long story, my sis is a slut that has no respect for her nor others). I CANT I KEEP MY FUCKING MOUTH SHUT??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE EVERYONE IN THIS FUCKING HOUSE!!!:bash:
  2. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    Why do you not want your father to know these things?

    Did you intend to speak about the psychologist? What caused that to come out? Alcohol makes me say things sometimes that I shouldn't tell people, other times I just get carried away talking.

    Do you think you will continue letting things slip out? In my experience when something I didn't want out comes out I shut down because of a lack of trust and don't talk again for some time.
  3. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Hi Hache,

    :( :hug:

    I feel for you. It's not your fault that your dad is abusive and your mom won't keep what you say between you two. :( Gah.. I don't know what to say.. am speechless.

    With care,

  4. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    caz he has nothin to do with my life. no one does in this house. and was the fight with my sis she was playing the victim and i said i went to psychologist too between other things. i should have kept my mouth shut!!! im an idiot what else :bash:
  5. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    not hache.. read before reply. thanks
  6. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    Oh ok I get why you said it.

    Actually something similar happened to me over 3 years ago, I was very very depressed, I had totally fucked up my course and my parents had gotten angry. My father sat me down and I could tell with the tone of his voice and the way he was saying things he was getting angry with my life, coming down hard on me to get me into shape, about to control my life. Then I rolled up my sleeve and showed him I self harmed (even though that wasn't half of what was bad) and it shocked him so much it changed the way he thought about how I felt, it gave me more control back and made him help me get what I needed.

    Do I regret saying it and showing him? Well it was very awkward, I had to try and ignore it and bury it from conversation. It felt horrible I did not want this to have come out. But what it achieved was a much better understanding for my pain. I got to move my life in a good direction. Even though it has never felt like a good thing saying what I did in terms of the effects it has been.

    So I guess what I am saying is yes you might never feel good about saying it, but it could have a positive impact on your life in terms of the way others now think about your emotions.
  7. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    my house is a living hell!! u have no idea of the drama. my father should be the one being held in a psychic ward for life. of course i wont trust neither of them caz maybe is THEIR FAULT im this freak, no?
  8. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    How are you a freak :(
  9. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    i have no one to love me. no friends. no life.
  10. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    That doesn't make you a freak. No circus would hire you for that :p

    Being lonely is a very normal emotion, some people like us do end up having no friends and no life but thats not something that has to be eternal. I know it is very difficult and there is no over night cure but it doesn't have to be this way.
  11. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    im extrovert and im a people person. people just dont like me and im afraid it wont change :sigh:
  12. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    I'm sure there are or will be people who will. I'm going through a similar issue, feeling of being boring to others, no one listens to me, I am ignored and it feels like even the friends I used to have until I moved away didn't value my opinion. But I do question how much that is exagerated by my lonliness or the demands and needs I place on others to give me.

    How old are you if you don't mind me asking? As you live at home I am guessing you live in a little world, one with routines and commitments?
  13. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    yeah guess im too demanding! too neeedy.. wtv... people dont appreciate nice people. they like being treated like shit, be lied to and so on. can we go to pm? i dont wanna disclose too much info in here.. if u want of course.