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hi, all. i'm not afraid of dying anymore.let's be very honest here. no one's going to miss me anyway. my mom has already given up on me... the person, of all people, the least i thought who do such thing... i have no reason to live anymore... my very family even disown me anyway. any last words from this website that could give me, i'll read 'em

 

My parents gave me to foster care when I was about 17 because I was always attempting.. They too gave up on me. Yet somehow here I am.. U can get through things.. I know the feeling when everyone else has given up on you. But maybe u can prove them wrong. And not give up on yourself!

I wish I could be of more help then that, just know I understand.

:hug: hugs

 

okay, maybe that came out too fast... but it is true that i feel pretty hopeless already, and that nothing could change that mindset i already have. i know you, guys, won't really get me now, but... i've already accepted the universal truth... that at the end--despite all the heart-felt promises--no one will stand by your side, and that it will only be you, alone, not even your parents or friends. so, it's sufficient for only me to know all my problems and suck it all up. anyway, maybe i shouldn't die today--maybe... i'm planning to take a walk later... around the district or so... it's very dangerous in our place--in fact, in my country lol, and i'm just a 16-year old girl, but i'm planning to wear a cap, hoodie, and some baggy jeans so, no one would really recognize me. i'll just take some precautions and maybe avoid some suspicious places in the city. i'm planning this later, in an hour or two, 'cause my dad arrives from work in two hours or so so, he won't catch me. anyway, wish me luck, guys, that i hope i find the answer to my god-forsaken life or don't get raped or kidnapped on the way lolz

 

I hope the walk helps you. They seem to help me a lot. Maybe u should get some pepper spray or something.. I carry a pocket knife for my own protection..

I hope you will be alright. Take care! :hug:

 

man, you know... honestly, i really feel you. i am really sorry about that... truly am... but it's just so hard to hear it just now--from my mother--the person who i've always and all this time, looked up to... and the person, who i thought the least to leave me and disown me just because she says "she's already tired". this is her exact words to me: "can we just, from now on, distance from each other? be close to your father, and i'll just work for the family. no more emotions between us"

it still hurts me when remembering those words she just told me, when i spoke to her to try to fix our broken relationship, which ended up the opposite way

 

I understand.. I also did not believe my parents would give up on me.. They didn't ever give up on my brothers.. And you would think that a strongly religious family would be in support of keeping the family together..

I can sorta understand where they could be coming from.. It's not only stressful and harmful to yourself as the person suffering with the illness, but it also can hurt the ones around you. And they may not know how to respond..

Just like anyone, they can also start to distance from something they feel that will loose so they wont become as hurt when they do loose it..

Your mom prob just doesn't know what to do.. And it does hurt to be told to distance urself. I know that for a fact.

:hug: Hope things will be alright. And maybe you should see if you can talk to a doctor about these things. They might be able to help some.

I'm glad you found this place and are reaching out.