okay, maybe that came out too fast... but it is true that i feel pretty hopeless already, and that nothing could change that mindset i already have. i know you, guys, won't really get me now, but... i've already accepted the universal truth... that at the end--despite all the heart-felt promises--no one will stand by your side, and that it will only be you, alone, not even your parents or friends. so, it's sufficient for only me to know all my problems and suck it all up. anyway, maybe i shouldn't die today--maybe... i'm planning to take a walk later... around the district or so... it's very dangerous in our place--in fact, in my country lol, and i'm just a 16-year old girl, but i'm planning to wear a cap, hoodie, and some baggy jeans so, no one would really recognize me. i'll just take some precautions and maybe avoid some suspicious places in the city. i'm planning this later, in an hour or two, 'cause my dad arrives from work in two hours or so so, he won't catch me. anyway, wish me luck, guys, that i hope i find the answer to my god-forsaken life or don't get raped or kidnapped on the way lolz