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  1. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    It just hurts really bad right now and im breaking :cry: Its so hard to stay safe. Meh >.< idk what to do :cry:
     
  2. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    :hug: sam keep pressing through hun you can do this
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You do what you are doing come here where it is safe where people understand. I hope this wave of sadness soon ends the rain it comes in and goes but you know you have felt the warmth of the sun too.
    I hope the sadness leaves you soon okay stay strong if not call for help okay
    you deserve happiness and healing reach out and get it for you okay.
     
  4. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Emma its so hard to keep going. I want to get better but am I strong enough? I dont think I am :cry:
     
  5. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :hug: Im trying...
     
  6. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    How you holding in there sweetie? :hugtackles:
     
  7. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Rich its just so hard :blub: It hurts so bad and i feel lost...i dont wanna keep doing this if its going to hurt this bad :hug:
     
  8. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Just keep holding onto those times it doesn't hurt and you feel happy and how nice and amazing those times feel, and that you have to give yourself chance to have more and more of them. Who knows what the future holds for any of us, but there is always hope and I am pretty damn sure in time it will get better, well I like to think that x <3
     
  9. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    <3 x I just cant think >.< I want the pain to stop now and there is only one way i know for sure that will happen :cry:
    Honestly I cant think of a time i was happy right now :cry: and its making it worse. I know i have been but i cant remember >.< <3
     
  10. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    What do you do when you failed and hurt the one person you love the most? How can i live with myself? How can i face people everyday knowing how awful i am? I cant :cry: I need t isolate myself....
     
  11. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    What's happened?
     
  12. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I hurt him...I did something stupid and now i cant think of anything else..except how worthless i am :(
     
  13. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    You're being too hard on yourself. We are human, we make mistakes. I am sure your friend is more then aware of your situation and understands.

    You're not worthless. Promise.

    I'm sorry i don't have the right words to give you. Struggling myself today. But i'll be around if you want to talk. I'll listen to you for as long as you need.
     
  14. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :( hes hurting and i make it worse...i always make everyones pain worse....only one way to stop that i guess :(
     
  15. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Sam, that's just friendship, nothing is ever going to be perfect. Just have to work on it and if the relationship is strong enough, you'll get through it together.

    You can't make anyone worse.

    Just take some deep breaths for me.
     
  16. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy


    I did make it worse. I rely on him to much and it makes him stressed. Im so fucked up bec.. so fucked up. I cant do this anymore if all i do is hurt people i love. And yeah its friendship but he never hurts me so why do i allow myself to continue to hurt him? or anyone for that matter? im fucking hidious :cry:
     
  17. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Oh Sam, i understand, i really do. I am currently in a very similar situation. There is someone that i reply on very heavily. And she is willing to support me through all this, because that's what friends do. She has made the decision to step back from me a bit, give herself some time to recharge. And it hurts me like hell, it makes me want to die. But i love her and i need her to do what is best for herself.

    He obviously sticks with you for a reason Sam and is choosing to stay no matter how hard it is. You are a good person and i am sure your a a support to him even though you might not feel like it.

    You've got a lot of people who care about you Sam, if you were as horrible as you think you are, do you think you would have all that? No.

    This is something i struggle with a lot myself, so i hope this post has been of some use to you.
     
  18. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy


    Its been a huge help :hug: Its hard aint it? to love them so much yet feel like this? GAH! :cry: I just want to hide...forever...or just die ....make it easier idk >.< im just so hurt and confused right now and i cant stop cutting >.<
     
  19. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Yes, it is horrible. I can't imagine anything much worse. But i know it's just a part of my illness and that things can be easier then this. But i have to work to change it. That's why i think you getting back i nto CBT and therapy is a great things for you. I think it will give you some direction and some coping skills.

    And yes, dying would be easier, but then you'd miss out on the good stuff too. And there is good stuff to be had :)

    Like playing I Spy last night, i don't know about you, but that was a lot of fun and i had a good laugh. I think it is important to recognise the little things, you know?
     
  20. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Yeah that was alot of fun :laugh: wet pants :wink:
    your right bec....thanks hun you always know how to bring me back up :cheekkiss:
     
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