A Friend

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by himynameisjake, Jan 31, 2010.

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  1. himynameisjake

    himynameisjake New Member

    Apologies if this is in the wrong section, but at first look I can't see a section for friends/family of suicidal people.

    So an internet friend of mine (meaning I can't meet him in person to solve anything, right now) has been depressed for quite a while ow and used to self harm. But with his fiancee he managed to get out of all that and things were looking up. Then he was away for 1 week because he had to "sort some complicated things out". Now today I got a message saying that things are definitely going bad, and he is even considering suicide.

    As you all might have helped others, or been in the situation of needing help - I was asking for some advice of what things I can say to make it better for him when he gets online. Thanks.
  2. PoisonS

    PoisonS Well-Known Member

    Well first of all you need to find out what's wrong before you can help him find a solution.

    Then you need to remind him that just because he feels bad now, doesn't mean things are going to be like this for the rest of his life.

    He also needs to get professional help for his depression.
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Also, let him know you care, and that you'll listen if and when he wants to talk about what's bothering him. As PoisonS said, encourage him to get professional help.
  4. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    The first thing he has going for him is you. Thank you for wanting to help. So many people "run" when another person or friend tries to talk about depression or suicidal feeilngs. Kudos to you!!!

    The best thing you can do is to support your friend. If and when he feels like talking, let him. Dont push the issues though. When he needs to he will talk.

    You need to suggest that he speak to his doctor about this as well. To determine if he may be suffering a mental health issue such as depression. His doctor can refer him to therapy, counselling etc. There are so many meds available that will help too. But he needs a correct diagnoses from a doctor to start on the way to beating this.

    And you need to remember yourself in this too. It can be just as difficult for a friend to deal with someone elses depression as it is the person suffering it. So please feel free to post here more asking for advice for your friend and yourself. Dont let his problems burn you out.

    Try going through some of the threads here and in other forums of SF. They is a lot of helpful advice throughout this site. There are also "stickys" (permanent posts) that have a lot of sage advice and words of understanding that you could share with him. Good luck.
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