A girl I liked and can't replace

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by jamie2, Apr 1, 2009.

  1. jamie2

    jamie2 Active Member

    Last year I held this job, that was suppose to only be a summer job, where one day I saw this girl that caught my eye. I talked to her and asked her if she was new, after doing so she freaks out on me and I simply say bye and go away. One month later, she appears again, a new employee. Slowly we started flirted back and forth, and everything went great. So foolishly I assumed this relationship would work so I decided to stay working there after the summer, which meant I would have to stay there for a year or so, due to finance issues.

    Anyways, one day she simply begins to ignore me, (rumors abound that I am weird probably were the reason) and I found out this is odd. So I try to talk to her and she simply ignores me. I have no clue what has happened. The next following weeks she gets really angry at me, and I simply find it difficult now to communicate with her at all. I get really depressed and fail at my schoolwork. Then December comes by and then this new employee shows up and she begins to frantically flirt with this guy, but very openly. They eventually form a relationship, but not after I was standing in front of her one day and she talks openly and very loudly in detail how she just finish sleeping with him. All this eventually just did me in. I could no longer deal with this and desperately tried to get out but I really liked this girl. What made everything worse was the fact that she eventually ended up coming back to me, and leaving me all over again, which confused me greatly. Eventually she got fired and I never saw her again.

    The worst part of everything is that I cannot replace her. I have tried, I do not know why this is, but it has a lot to do with her childlike personality which I cannot find in anyone else. It has been a year, I don't know how to cope with this, but I have forgotten about her and am not really looking to start a relationship with her ever again, but I simply cannot replace her, nor find a girlfriend that I like anymore because of her. By the way, I have never been in a relationship or known someone as long as I did her, which is sad since I cannot consider her and me as a relationship. In addition, now that I am older I find myself not liking the girls my age at all, everyone seems so much more mature than what I can deal with... I don't know what to do.
  2. asri

    asri Well-Known Member

    give it time. stop using her as a yardstick to measure every other girl that comes ur way. unless u r open for a relationship, u will not form one.

    hope u r able to clear ur mind and think it thru.

    everyone of us is wierd in our own way... and who defines normalcy?

    take care. n u will find a lot of people in a similar boat who can lend u a helping hand and help u pull thru
  3. jamie2

    jamie2 Active Member

    That probably would work but my concern is still with age group and being overtly immature and not being able to date girls my age, and really not wanting to. Appearance-wise I cannot seem to find anyone I like, and I am not using her as a yardstick for dating others, I just really can't seem to find someone I like or who likes me anymore. I am also concern because each year I become older and begin to fall behind everyone else. This is really starting to bother me.
  4. jamie2

    jamie2 Active Member

    Another note, I don't find or believe myself to be weird, I just know that people find me weird, I really don't care what they say about me. What I meant by me being weird is that those rumors led her to not like me anymore. But I really mean that I cannot find anyone I like, especially not in my age group mid-20s, it seems everyone is already doing something and given up hope on being something better, they lost their youthful spirit in other words and I am tired of that. By the way, I really don't have much of a sex drive so I really can care less on sexual attraction but I really care about someone's character which makes this girl almost irreplaceable, believe me I have tried to find someone as animated at my age-group as she was its impossible, and otherwise if I cannot find someone that even comes close to raising my interest as she did then I just rather be alone.
  5. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Heh i hade somewhat the same crap going on with me as well...
    took me 2 freaking years to overcome her ^^
    but eventualy i did

    one thing i learnd from this all
    our brain is not mechanical and eventualy we will overcome the most unbelivble
    and the most strong feelings, its natural, thats how our brain is designed
    so just give it a time
  6. jamie2

    jamie2 Active Member

    Yes, I know, I am almost over her. The reason that getting over her was really hard was because she looked like I did when I was younger. That makes it really hard to get over her, I really don't like relationships so I don't really get in them that often.