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A letter from my daughter

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Sunspots

Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#1
I've just found a note written by my daughter last year when I went missing..

Mum
I loved you so much, I wish that you had known that. Those special memories of you will always make me smile. If only I could have you back for just a little while so we could sit and talk just like we used to. I loved you and always will. The fact that you're no longer here will always cause me pain but I'm glad you're no longer in pain. You will be forever in my heart.
Until we meet again.

I'm broken. Sitting in the garden crying. I've caused my children so much pain. I tell them every day how much I love them but I'm not sure they'll ever believe that now. How could I do that to them? What kind of a mother can be so selfish? God, I hate myself for what I've put them through.
 

Ash600

SF Creative
SF Supporter
#2
But another way of looking at it, Lu, is realising how much your children love you and that you have been given another opportunity to share the future with them. Leave the past behind, look forward to create memories from happy moments.
 

Mercedesgirl

Well-Known Member
#3
Your not selfish , you were in a very low place, you are still here now to be a good mother, you are a lovely person, sending you a massive (((((hug)))))

I know how issues with children can be, be strong
 

dtc

at least that's what I keep telling myself!
#4
You must have done lots of things right to have your daughter care about you that much, and you are still here so things can get better. Do it for both of you.

Take care
 

nobodyknows71

For a Phoenix to rise, it must first burn.
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#5
Sounds to me a lot like she loves you very much regardless of what you’ve ‘put her through’
Ash is right, look forward and cherish the moments you still have together.
 
#6
Agree with all above...you clearly are an amazing mom...so cherish your times with her now and into the future...sending you hugs...
 

Petal

SF dreamer
Staff member
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#7
I agree with all the above too, you were in a bad place - that is not a crime. You may have hurt them at the time but you can only move forwards now and make a million and one new beautiful heart cherishing memories, you're an amazing mom :)
 

sassy123

SF hugger
Staff member
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#8
Hugs be grateful that you are still with them they love you. You are stronger because you have them. I know it’s all been hard but we all struggle just be glad you are with them now. Hugs
 

Lara_C

In the Big Things in Life We Are One.
SF Supporter
#9
Don't hate yourself Lu - you were very ill at the time and the intensity of the pain was overwhelming your mind to the point where it blocked your awareness of just how much you are truly loved and valued. I hope that finding this treasure from your beloved daughter will always remind you of that and become a source of strength which anchors you, whatever happens.
 

Walker

Everything Zen
Staff member
ADMIN
SF Social Media
SF Supporter
#10
Pretty sure you should be looking at that from the side of how awesome it is that you're not gone from her. That pain was brief, your return is permanent.
 
#11
I've just found a note written by my daughter last year when I went missing..

Mum
I loved you so much, I wish that you had known that. Those special memories of you will always make me smile. If only I could have you back for just a little while so we could sit and talk just like we used to. I loved you and always will. The fact that you're no longer here will always cause me pain but I'm glad you're no longer in pain. You will be forever in my heart.
Until we meet again.

I'm broken. Sitting in the garden crying. I've caused my children so much pain. I tell them every day how much I love them but I'm not sure they'll ever believe that now. How could I do that to them? What kind of a mother can be so selfish? God, I hate myself for what I've put them through.
Hey. I’m a terrible Mom. Never physical abuse but verbal abuse of my 2 daughter’s (mean comments when we disagree about anything, demeaning and basically just a poor excuse for a Mother.
 

HumanExMachina

Jazz hands
Staff member
Safety & Support
SF Artist
SF Supporter
#12
She loves you. She loves you so much she wrote this note. If you weren't a good mother to her that note would never have been written. You're very lucky to have this caliber of love in your life, Lula. No, not lucky, you earned it and you deserve it.
 
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