a lie

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by pit, Apr 6, 2008.

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  1. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I can say things will get better, but I'd be lying. The truth is that everyone is on the downward slope towards death, and sometimes things don't get better.

    I can say I'm special and have plenty to give. Another lie. I'm not special, just one of billions of people in the world. A piece of meat taking up space. A finite organism. And I'm way too introverted to deal with the world at large. It's not like I haven't tried.

    My death will benefit the Earth. And me, too. That's the truth.
  2. SadDude1980

    SadDude1980 Well-Known Member

    I wouldn't doubt your self worth :( I do that a lot, I feel sometimes like I'm not going to be a special character or celebrity written into history, not even in a ridicule way like Michael Jackson.

    I think all of here are feeling the nasty cycle of the downward slope. Sometimes you catch yourself clawing and scraping to keep from falling into to the bottom and ask yourself, "why bother?" and then you slip a bit more. I have no tips on how to break that cycle. But I do know what you mean :(

    I hope and pray though that you do find a way out.
  3. StangerInAStrangeLand

    StangerInAStrangeLand Well-Known Member

    Howdy pit,

    I hear you - this world is a pretty messed up place. Believe it or not I think we (us on the forum) are all fairly normal people with a rational sense of the world around us - everyone else seems to have a delusion about how we live in some kind of 'wonderful world' or they are somehow special when it's a horrible lie. Life is down-hill, it doesn't get 'better' (except rare moments of happiness or a chuckle). Right now I'm just alive because it's really hard to die - and I figure just living through all the misery and sorrow I at least see all of it (because dying is really, really hard, did I forget to mention I've tried about every method in the book, some got real close to success - been in hospitals off and on for about 11 years).

    If you want to talk about this messed up world, or commiserate on this miserable existence feel free to PM or IM me (my IM's are in my profile) - up for just talking and venting too.
  4. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    Thank you both. Your validation was sorely needed. It's a relief that honest expression can elicit insightful feedback.
  5. Ugly

    Ugly Active Member

    I agree with you, but unless your ugly, you have no excuse to kill yourselves
  6. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I don't mean to be rude, but that statement is just too funny!:laugh:

    Getting serious: My ugliness is on the inside. And there's not a damn thing I can do about it. External ugliness is in the eye of the beholder.
  7. Lost Forever

    Lost Forever Well-Known Member

    Don't you have a family? How would they feel?
  8. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Your inside uglyness, you can always try to change that. Your outside uglyness, you can never change it.
  9. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I have a couple good friends. My family is either gone or dead. I think my friends are my family. I'd hate to hurt them. But they know how miserable I am. And they have their own pressures. I don't see them every day, so most of the time, I'm alone. If they weren't in my life anymore, I don't know what I would do. Probably kill myself.
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