A little advice

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Kurto2021, Jun 28, 2007.

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  1. Kurto2021

    Kurto2021 New Member

    Let me preface this by saying if you asked anyone my wife has associated with they would all respond that she is the nicest and most sweet person they know. She is the type of person that when she calls or emails friends or family she always has to apologize for calling them (I always feel like she thinks what she has to say is not important to the recipient) anyway let me get to the story..

    She has friends but for some reason never talks to them that much. Not to long ago she was introduced to a guy and for some reason she really opened up to him. I would have been worried but since he is gay and acts like one of the girls I was fine with it. Anyway she started emailing him and talking to him and at the point she asked him to go to dinner with her I had to step in (that's a date). I started to get a little worried so for some damn reason I threw a keylogger on to the computer before I left today and this is the email she sent when i was gone.
    I'd like to point out that I don't read her emails but I have been doing some stuff with paypal and it involves checking the emails pretty much everyday. Her email is the paypal account so for the last week I have been constantly checking it.

    Person XXX is a mutual friend of both of these two. Any advice for me on how to approach her? I never thought she was cheating either by the way.
  2. I hope she isn't cheating on you,, Kurt, though if she is, I suggest you talk with her about it, and hopefully find out the truth. Take care.
  3. Kurto2021

    Kurto2021 New Member

    I think you missed the point of my post. I couldn't care less if she were cheating that isn't the concern. It is the insane comment about throwing herself down the stairs and wondering if anyone would care.

    I know she didn't cheat that isn't a concern at all.
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Does your wife suffer from depression Kurt? If so, depression leads a person to believe that noone care for them. it wouldn't matter if they were alive or not. You also don't care about yourself. You don't feel worthy of existing and feel the world would be better off without you. I can't sat if this is the stage she is in, but it may be a possibilty. Another thought is maybe since she thinks you have been reading her e-mails, could she be looking for some type of reaction from you? Maybe this is a way of reaching out for help. I hope you get things figured out for your own peace of mind. Let us know how things progress. :hug:
  5. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Hey Kurt,
    I don't know the ins and outs but from what you said your wife may be feeling low and/or unappreciated or stressed etc. If you don't mind me asking, how's the relationship between you two? Does she seem depressed or anything of the sort?

    Maybe taking your wife out for a meal or a break away will help her feel better. The fact that she wonders if anyone would care if she was to hurt herself is a bit concerning.

    She's also talking to this guy when she really should be talking to you about this, but maybe she feels uncomfortable with the issue. Not that she feels uncomfortable with you, sometimes it's hard to tell the people we are closest to our true feelings.

    I suggest you have a talk with your wife and ask her how she is, maybe ask if she is happy and that you're there if she wants to talk about anything.

    Best of luck.
  6. hey there, just wanted to throw in my two cents. I was recently engaged and as resistance said, it is hard to tell the ones closest to us how we are truly feeling. I hope that you and your wife can work things out. the only thing I can reccommend is just to be there for her and be supportive of her...those are the things that help one come out of depression. She needs you right now, and you can be there for her. I hope that everything works out with y'all! Take care.
  7. Maybe you should take some time out of your daily routine to do extra-special things for her? It sounds like she feels you may be too occupied with other things and she cannot confide in you then. Show her how much you care, throw in some special things to surprise her with. Go out on a date, spend more attention to her, cuddle up with her more often. Tell her how much you appreciate her being in your life and how you wouldn't know where you'd be without her. Let her know that she is special to you and very much worth your attention.
    If you have feelings of depression or such, this is the time to share with her so she understands that your relationship can handle her telling you about her emotional issues. Confide in her so she knows how special she is to you and how strong the relationship is.
    :hug: I hope all works out well.
  8. junkie

    junkie Guest

    If you thought your wife was reluctant to open up to you before, just wait til she finds out about that keylogger.
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