A little bit lost

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Blink359, Nov 27, 2011.

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  1. Blink359

    Blink359 New Member

    Hi guys,

    Firstly I want to apologize for having to burden more people with my problems but I just need to try and get help.

    I don't know what is wrong, I feel that I am too emotional all the time, Whenever something bad happens to me or when I
    have negitive emotions I can go into these deep depressive moods, I hate it, I don't know why they have to happen.
    I should be the happiest I have ever been, I have great friends, An amazing girlfriend. But I still feel life isnt going
    well, 6th form isn't going great because I can't concentrate, I have failed the first year because I can't concetrate and
    I have to do 2 years in less than 1 year I know I can do it but I cant.


    But down to the moods, I find that they come and go, I can go a while without
    them then some small thing will come and set
    it all off again, Litterally it can be the stupidest smallest thing, but it still sets me off, I find that being around my
    friends help but now it's happening more and more I am finding it more and more painfull to burden them with my problems all
    the time even though they tell me it's ok. I also get the feeling of suicide A LOT, When the feelings come up it's all I can
    think about, How it would be so easy, so quick, and in a flash all my problems would be gone forever, I can't walk into a room
    or place without finding more than one thing that could kill me in that room/place, But I have a fear of suicde
    the fear of nothingness after death and also and more importantly I dont want to commit suicide alltogether
    I enjoy life, as I said above I should be the happiest I have ever been, But the worse my moods get I feel like I could ruin
    my life so quickly with so few words and I feel if I do push my friends and girlfriend away I will have nothing to live for
    and the fear will just vanish.


    Anyway I think I have summed up most of it, I just need help, I don't like the idea of councelling but I'm being told to try it more and more now.
    Again I apologize for burdening more people with this,


    Regards,


    Nathan
     
  2. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Hi Nathan - just to let you know I've read this - I guess from your language that you're in the UK....it being nearly 3AM I'm not gonna be able to give a well-thought-out reply at this point - but if you'd like to get in contact via PM and talk it through then feel free to do so.

    Nobody deserves to feel the way you do - and talking about it on a site such as this is par for the course - not burdensome.

    Please get in touch,
    Chris
     
  3. cordial1

    cordial1 Well-Known Member

    Hi Nathan,

    I understand completely what you're saying and where you're coming from. I have depression, and I don't understand it either. I should be more than ecstatic with my current situation, I have a good family, and great boyfriend, and some of the greatest friends.

    However, like you say, that doesn't stop the sudden waves of emotion, or how the smallest things set me off.

    (As silly as this sounds.. almost childish) but I thought I was the only one in the world who was remotely in my situation, to feel the way I do, and think the things I do.

    I DO go to counseling, and take medication, and the meds DO help! I still have the depressed moods, and I still get set off quite easily but, that is where counseling helps, it really does.. So you might want to make it an option? It really has helped me. Even though I still have troubles, but the people here are wonderful. :)
     
  4. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Hi Nathan
    Welcome to suicide forum. Its a wonderful, kind and caring place. You are not a burden at all !!!!! What you describe sounds so painful. I think you have come to the right place, for sure.

    Nathan, have you talked with your physician about this? Sometimes things such as you describe can be a physical imbalance. When thats the case, people can find amazing relief with medications. If thats whats going on, then it is possible that you could find relief in medications. It could be that simple.

    For some, medications are frighting and they resist them. For others they are so relieved to think that feeling better might be that simple.
    I dont know if medications are the answer for you. But I thought I would mention it.

    you sound like such a nice person. I am glad you are here. Above all, please do not di anything to hurt yourself. No matter what. Fight those urges. :hug:
     
  5. Blink359

    Blink359 New Member

    Hi again, Thanks for the responses,

    It seems after posting on a few forums I'm getting the same sort of answers which is go to councelling but as much as hear it helps and think it could help me, I just find it hard to open up to complete stangers without some sort of shield, I.E opening up to people here my shield is the forum protecting my identity, And @flowers I have talked to my doctor a few months ago due to sleeping problems related to this, I restricted what I told them but I had a blood test which came out ok, So what I am going through is entirely emotional/mental.

    Regards,

    Nathan
     
  6. Severijn

    Severijn Well-Known Member

    Hi there Blink359.

    I don't know exactly what's going on with you, but it sounds a bit like depression, mood swings, maybe a bit of anxiety, perhaps some self-esteem issues, I don't know exactly.

    You also mention that you don't like the idea of counseling. Personally for me therapy didn't do much for me. For some people it works great and they get a lot of results but this wasn't me. What worked for me was reading a lot of self-help books. If you take the lessons from self-help books seriously you could be in a way your own therapist. I'll look up some books on amazon.com to give you an idea. Perhaps they can help you along:

    - http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_n...ks&field-keywords=depression+workbook&x=0&y=0

    - http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_n...m+workbook&rh=n:283155,k:self-esteem+workbook

    - http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_s...words=psycho+cybernetics&sprefix=psycho+cyber (this is a great book: psycho cybernetics)

    - http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_s...words=goal-setting&rh=n:283155,k:goal-setting

    I'm sure there are a couple of good books in those lists. Hope this helps you a bit. Take care.
     
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