A little help, how do I meet girls?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by dax, Apr 17, 2015.

  1. dax

    dax Well-Known Member

    I'll start off by saying I've tried internet dating sites and no one I've been interested in has shown interest back. I've sent out over 300 pms and all it did was depress me so I gave up. And yes I've tried paid and free sites. The latest try was the girl at the resturaunt, but well she's obviously not interested. I dont drink....so I dont meet women that way. I'm not exactly a wealth of experience at this which is why I ask.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hmmm, im not a guy but i'll state how I can meet guys, i'm not joking when I say I met my last bf in the psych ward-that did not go well.
    You can meet a girl in lots of places such as a nightclub, bar, sports place, soccer matches, bingo, swimming, library, at a course. Remember the key is how you introduce yourself. Shake her hand and smile, that always worked on me and also compliment her on something to woo her :) Do some short courses where you know girls will be and see how it goes... your last experience is just that...an experience to give you confidence in the future. You didn't do anything wrong. Having hobbies in common will help :)
  3. Koji

    Koji Well-Known Member

    Talk to her like a human being, be polite, respectful, and pleasant. You don't know her yet, just see her as someone you may or may not like, and attempt to get to know her.
  4. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    Go out and do something. If youre attracted to someone then introduce yourself, say hello, start a conversation about whats going on wherever you two are. Compliment her.

    If shes receptive, then after the conversation, ask if she'd like to meet again when shes available doing something you both like. It's a good reason to exchange numbers. :)

    Lots of pretty, sweet ladies hang out at libraries, museums, parks, public events. There are also Singles meetups in every major city. I havent done them, but if youre looking for romance then you need to find single women who are also looking.

    PS: Youre a little too old to be meeting -girls- no?
  5. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    That makes me wonder. How does your profile look? What age group are you into?

    Online dating is kind of the most complex labyrinth to nagivate thru. Its mind boggling from my experience. Most men that contacted me did not read what I was looking for in my profile. Im no longer part of any of that I stopped that 8 years ago and met my ex through work. Go figure.
  6. lachrymose27

    lachrymose27 Well-Known Member

    I once thought date sites were the way to go. But as you get older the dating pool just sort of diminishes. I am also tired of this game. Showing interest but not receiving back any.
  7. iBananya

    iBananya Member

    There are as many different ways to attract a partner as there are people in the world :) To start, give us an idea of how your profile is laid out maybe? Some things can make all the difference in how they are worded alone :) Also, what kind of messages do you send out? I've dabbled in those sites in the past from curiosity, and 90% or more of the messages that would come in from guys or girls would be about like this - "Hi, how are you?" or "You seem really fun and cute" or something.... Which is not really very interesting! It kind of says "Hi, I browse around here and message anyone that is active, I can't say why you caught my eye but please reply to me!". The other way, are messages that are very thought out and wordy, but you can tell are literally copied and pasted to everyone on the site. The far less common, were messages that were genuinely well thought out and seemed like the person had interest :)

    The best way (at least what I used to look for) was a message that made it very clear he/she took the time to read my profile, was interested in me, asked more than just how I am (for example about my work, my life, etc.) Also helps if the "hey sexy" kind of stuff is left out.

    Anyway, give us a bit of an idea how you word your profile and messages? Also the photos you use, are they simply your face? Are you doing something fun in them/with friends or something? I don't necessarily mean post all that you do there, just give us an idea what you have and we can try to help you spark it up a bit ;)

    As others have said, online dating is by FAR the hardest. For a number of reasons!
  8. trevordd

    trevordd Member

    Hi there! I am in the same boat too. I am looking for someone new to date. I use Tinder and Kovla website for this purpose, it works great too. But I want to get some new acquaintances here for now. Feel free to communicate
  9. I've always found that looking for someone is not the way to find someone. When I'm not looking for someone I usually find someone, or more often that someone finds me. Also the people I find myself with are more the one I would like to find. I really think no one really needs anyone in the first place so looking for someone isn't something one should do. It's a populated world and everyone knows and meets a lot of people all the time, so as far as a "romantic" or "sexual" relationship could occur - it will occur naturally anyway. There is no need to go looking for that.
  10. dax

    dax Well-Known Member

    I've tried being oppurtunistic, laid back, not very actively seeking, and even not really trying. I've gotten dates in the past, but i've gotten nothing....its been like this for about 20 years. I dont want to find someone when I'm old and gray, I'm about to run out of time if I want a family.
  11. dax

    dax Well-Known Member

    Well online the messages I send are hello of course, but I ask them things about what they put on their profiles like what they like to do for fun and why, ask things like what's the funniest thing thats ever happened to them, try to bring up what we have in common and what got them into it.