How can I start? To put it simply I can't just start, and now here I am on a suicide forum... I am in a constant search for self preservation and good health. I find I'm socially impaired, isolated, alone... I'm but that one in a void of zeros. I stand out as weird to many people. I have been isolated for 9 years. Painful it has been to bear. I am the type of person that is intellegent, efficient, and nearly void of emotion at times. Sortof Vulcan like you could say. However when I am really alone I can have emotional breakdowns that melt me. I can't stand it. I try to keep away negative thoughts by using my mind to the maximum by multitasking. Talking to people, watching a movie and playing two video games at the same time. Yes I'm addicted to video games. I have meet people from the other side of the world, yet I still struggle with the fact that I'm socially incompatible with all physical people. My classmates all play a video game I also play. I offered to play that game with them to; however, they awkwardly shifted the topic, ignored me, or started talking to someone else. I can't bare to take more. It is stressful too stressful. I need help, I don't know how or where. I feel like I'm missing something everyone else has by default except for me. Please help me.
A one in a void of zeros
- Thread starter Serenity-
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Welcome to the forum and the SF family as you are important. Video games are important as they help you to focus and form a release of life. Perhaps you can strong enough not to play videos for one day to break the cycle of playing games. Perhaps spend tine at the mall or go bike riding.
You classmates are just totally ignorant and that is no doubt hurtful. I know it causes you pain but try not to take it to heart. Have you sort therapy or medication. I respect your privacy and if you do not want to answer then that's fine. You are among people who care about YOU.
YOU need to chat to others in the chatroom where you will be welcomed and make good friends with others. YOU won't be judged but cared for. Use us to be your friends and help YOU in your hour of need.
Take care and keep posting my friend. If you are crying, then that's ok as it releases the pain from with.
You classmates are just totally ignorant and that is no doubt hurtful. I know it causes you pain but try not to take it to heart. Have you sort therapy or medication. I respect your privacy and if you do not want to answer then that's fine. You are among people who care about YOU.
YOU need to chat to others in the chatroom where you will be welcomed and make good friends with others. YOU won't be judged but cared for. Use us to be your friends and help YOU in your hour of need.
Take care and keep posting my friend. If you are crying, then that's ok as it releases the pain from with.
Loneliness is quite like a monster, and it's a prevalent one at best. Everyone has faced it or will face it eventually, but I understand we each have our own ways with it. It makes us feel miserable, hopeless, in an endless season of despair, but however dreadful it may be, its solution is a simple one. Things resolve themselves with time, for nobody is alone, not forever. You say you have found people on the other side of the world, meaning that the possibility of meeting people like them in a physical environment is highly probable. I know that it may be difficult to interact socially, but perhaps with enough practice you can find that the communication process is fundamentally the same, just without the distance barrier which is capable of isolating social interaction to mere text boxes. Now, aside from this, your classmates don't seem like friend material. If they are not willing to accept you, try looking into other places, as playing the same game doesn't necessarily dictate friendship material as well as their character does.
Well, friends do come with their flaws, but they're friends nonetheless.
Now this is from some personal experience, but I think that in situations of possible social awkwardness and outcasting it may be best to find friends on a one on one basis. When people are in groups they tend to retract into their little social circles and not mind whatever outsider they come to encounter. If you are to approach someone alone, however, they don't really have anybody else to retract to, and despite possible initial social frustrations, a good, personal conversation may come through.
Now this is from some personal experience, but I think that in situations of possible social awkwardness and outcasting it may be best to find friends on a one on one basis. When people are in groups they tend to retract into their little social circles and not mind whatever outsider they come to encounter. If you are to approach someone alone, however, they don't really have anybody else to retract to, and despite possible initial social frustrations, a good, personal conversation may come through.
If you come to befriend people through this method (although, again, it takes practice and is still hit or miss) you can open up previous social hindrances. Someone who grows fond of you may pretty much give you some good reputation and sympathy among other people. Just choose who you intend to befriend wisely, and don't let desperation interfere. (even though this may initially be a difficult task.)
haha see you do have a great sense of humour :P I understand where you are coming from, I was in that situation before and still kind of now. It is an awkward feeling, I would suggest anti anxiety medications, they can help relax you and feel better about yourself, go for it, keep reaching out again and again practice makes perfect 
SF is always here for you and many of us can relate. Best wishes.
SF is always here for you and many of us can relate. Best wishes.
i used to be socially awkward. now i'm kind of the opposite. for me my awkwardness was due to adhd (not actually professionally diagnosed) and once i found a cure for that (caffeine pills/instant coffee/caffeine) my social skills gradually improved to the point where now i would say they are above average. i used to have good social skills with an adrenaline rush but caffeine replaced that basically.
this is just me ... i don't know if you have adhd. you might have asperger's but i don't know how that would be treated. i think you can learn social skills if you are smart enough, which it seems like you are, it'll just be a little more work for you. maybe a stimulant could help you. got to talk with your psychiatrist or get one if you don't have one already.
this is just me ... i don't know if you have adhd. you might have asperger's but i don't know how that would be treated. i think you can learn social skills if you are smart enough, which it seems like you are, it'll just be a little more work for you. maybe a stimulant could help you. got to talk with your psychiatrist or get one if you don't have one already.
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