I feel totally unwanted, unloved, used, worthless -- basically like shit. I can't find a job, no one wants to hire me. I can't find a roommate, no one wants to live with me. I can't find a partner, no one wants to be mistaken for the baby's daddy, not even the baby's daddy. He won't have anything to do with his daughter, because I am the mother. Because I was unpopular in jr. high. Because he made fun of me and still refers to me to this day as $5. I am not a teen mother. There isn't much I can do, or really, anything I can do at all to improve my situation. I am on welfare. My car's dying. My rent is unpaid. I have no where to go. I have this beautiful 6 month old daughter, and I am in extreme emotional pain. I want the pain to end. My father committed suicide. I want to as well, but I don't even have the strength to end my pathetic life. I have no motivation. My diet is shit. I don't even want to walk outside. I don't want to see the sun. I don't want to see the view. I have lost many friends. I had my whole life ahead of me. I was depressed, broken. I thought having a baby would give me strength. It's not enough. Nothing is enough. Nothing I can do or anyone else can do can save me. I'm ruined. My life is shit. There is no way out of this hole. I will rot here.