A step closer!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by GoldenPsych, Jul 31, 2008.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    Work was horrible today - at least it was better than being alone with my thoughts. Do you ever find that you sit there and suddenly 2 hours have passed and all you have done is sat there. No TV and not thinking about anything in particular. I got caught out today. I was just sat there looking at my screen on computer in my own world. 30mins passed and then someone came knockin on the office door saying I was being quiet. 30 mins is nothing though compared to sometimes.

    It wasn't as hot today. I didn't sleep last night though. Maybe tonight I will.

    I am one step closer to my plan anyway. So is all good then on that front!
     
  2. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    If your plan is a negative one (you know what I mean by negative) then don't go through with it. Why would you want to, you have people who care about you.
     
  3. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I am going through with it as I can't fight anymore.
     
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    What about your future, the life that is ahead of you. What about those close to you like family and friends.
     
  5. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    You know when someone dies and it comes as a welcome relief as you know they are not suffering anymore. Well that is what it will be like!
     
  6. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    So your family and friends would be relieved that your not suffering anymore? They would be soo much more upset and hurt by your loss more then anything else.
     
  7. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Please reconsider this hun.
    Your plan would hurt so many people.
    I understand how you feel i really do. :hug:
    But the impact on all the peoples lives who care about you, and there are alot, would be tremendous and it could ruin them for life.
    This isn't the way hun :hug:
    Am always around if you wanna talk.
     
  8. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    It is that I cant cope anymore. I cant go on fighting it at all. It has beaten me now. I cant see any other way out of it!
     
  9. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Try to see past all that, you have a life to live. Once it's gone, all that will be left is "what if" and "if only" as well as wasted potential.
     
  10. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey GP,
    You need to call your doctor and tell him you are on your way to the hospital. Then you need to get off your butt and go there. You are close to being in crisis and you need help.
    We don't want to loose you. I enjoy reading your posts. Please do as I ask and go to the hospital now and tell them you are suicidal and you are beyond planning .You are ready to commit. I will be thinking of you!!
     
  11. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I agree with Stranger1. There are always options available besides suicide. You have to be willing to try them and see if they help. People will not be relieved that you are gone. They will be devastated. Your mind is telling you what you would like to hear so it makes it easier to go through with your plans. It is deceiving you. Please go in for help. :hug:
     
  12. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    My mind is made up on this one. Just hope I dont throw up!
     
  13. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Please Golden Psych don't go thru with it!!!! you are needed here. You have loved ones you just need to sit them down and let them know your thoughts. Will you please go to the hospital and let them adjust your meds. You are cared for by all of us!! WE would be happy to talk to you one on one. If you were to do something it would leave alot of pain behind. Not just your family, and friends. It would leave us at the forum feeling empty. You have made friends with alot of us and if we could talk to you in person you would see just how concerned we are for you.Keep posting so we know you are still with us. Take Care...
     
  14. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I can;t talk to anyone. It doesn't help anyway. I am a useless waste of space. No one wants to be around me as end up bringing them down to. I cant keep putting that on people.

    I have brought myself 2 bottles of wine. Come 7pm I am going to start putting my plan in to action. Knowing my luck I will prob mess that up as I mess everything else up 2. I have tidied up everywhere and started putting things in to boxes etc.

    I have struggled in for 2 long with this. I don't have the energy anymore. The final punch has been thrown!
     
  15. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    You are NOT a waste of space.
    You are deserving. You deserve to have relief, and suicide is NOT the only way.
    :hug:
     
  16. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    golden you are not a waste of space. please think again about your plan. i know you are suffering and just want the pain to end, and who wouldn't. but suicide does not have to be your only option. we care for you. your boyfriend cares for you. your friends care for you. please let us help.
     
  17. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    Everything I do I seem to fail at. My relationship is not going well, he said he doesnt want to loive together, I have no money and I am faling at work. Uni is a waste of time and I am unable to get a new job. On top of all that (in which a person without depression would be depressed) I am feeling so low and useless that I can't do anything right. Nothing happens for the good anymore!
     
  18. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I just burnt my hand! Lit some incence - and it then dropped on to my hand :sad:
     
  19. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    it's the depression that tells you that you are useless and a failure. you know, it's like your brain has a filter on it that hides all of your successful moments from you. thing is, depression is a sneaky liar. don't believe what it says. it can take a while to replace of it's lies with positive messages but it can be done. please don't give up hope.
     
  20. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    It's a bit late for that
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.