I was about 8 years old and i was playing in a club house( I remember this like it was yesterday), with my friend Robby. Robby's mom came and picked him up left me alone in the house. I was still coloring. Rodger came up to color too. He was about 13. I remember he kissed me on my cheek. I didn't know what to do. I kept coloring. I was in catholic school and always wore my uniform after school cuz I wasn't at the babysitters long. He put his hand up my skirt and it went from there. Every time Robby would leave for what my mom said was about 6 months he would come up and touch, kiss, or even more sometimes. One time he came up with one of his friends who was staying with him. His friend was older about 14 and learned about sex. So they wanted to try it. I was the girl they chose. It took me a while to tell my mom. I was embarrassed. I went to therapy but my mom wouldn't let me talk about it out side of that. When Robby found out he became my big protector. I finally grew up enough to go to day care and then babysit my self. It worked out much nicer. While I was growing up I had a lot of friends. Ryan, Aubrey and Brittany were my best friends. Ryan and Aubrey were inseparable. They started dating when they were like 2. lol. Ryan's dad got sick and he became angry. Aubrey and Ryan fought a lot. She ended up getting pregnant. One day while she was at home and i was at my new job. We were about 15 Ryan was 17 or 18. She tried to call me. She was upset about something. She ended up killing herself. I went to her house after work and found her in the bath tub. The biege carpet outside the door was pink and wet. I looked up at her. There was blood everywhere. Her eyes were white, but open. The water was still running so I went and shut it off. I sat next to the bath tub for what seemed like hours, more like a minute or two. I went downstairs and sat on the couch. I remember looking at my foot prints in the white carpet. It took me about 10 mins but i eventually called 911. It was a rough time so Ryan and I became close. But soon after that I realized he didnt seem me. He saw Aubrey. When I couldnt be her he got angry. And hateful. He blamed me for her death. He hit and raped me alot. At 16 I became pregnant. He took care of that. He knocked me down a flight of stairs at Cedar Point in front of my kids I was a councilor too. My concern wasnt me but them. Kris was my savor. Whenever something happened he was right there to help me get better. I went to him for everything. I trusted him. He ended up cheating on me and using for a sex toy as well. Then Chad, my fiance. Now i am dealing with Ryan. (refer to trying to cope) So far life is pretty good but that the past, one that never seems to go away. One that will haunt me forever. The past i am forced to remember everyday. But i over came it. So can you. It doesnt go away but it does get easier Now I am happy with an amazing boyfriend and a great life. That stalker ex will not take that away. I am in control and no one else.