So.. here i am again. Sitting awake after midnight, trying to think of a reason to go to sleep and wake up tomorrow. It has got to the stage now where the only time i can function is if i have some kind of way out of everything if it gets too much. Example: I sleep with boxes of tablets close to hand and a knife if things get really bad. It's starting to become a joke now! I was doing so well through the week and now i'm back to my old pathetic ways again. It's getting close to my 22nd birthday (June) and im really starting think and kind of wish that i won't make it that far. Just a matter of time before it all becomes too much for me and i just let go of the very lose grip i have on life.