abandoned after attempt?

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by aquila, May 25, 2008.

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  1. aquila

    aquila Member

    Has anyone else been abandoned by friends after a suicide attempt? When I woke up in a hospital the morning after my suicide attempt I got a message that my friend didn't want to be a part of my life in the future :sad:
  2. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    that's terrible. maybe they have some unresolved issues around suicide themselves. i'm sure you are coming up with many reasons of your own, probably being pretty hard on yourself. i hope you find some other friends to lean on. to start, there's SF. you'll find some pretty nice people here. did the hospital set you up with a crisis team?
  3. sweetsweet

    sweetsweet Well-Known Member

    I didn't really have any friends to chase away. People acted differently towards me though. That's why I'm careful about who I tell about it or about being diagnosed with a mental illness.
  4. ZundertowZ

    ZundertowZ Well-Known Member

    people do seem to enjoy kicking u while yr down! its pretty sic!
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    The timing your friend had was terrible, Many times people are afraid to be friends with those who have attempted because they are afraid and don't know how to handle the situation. they also fear the stigma associated with it, as if it may just rub off on them. In both attempting and succeeding, the end results are no friends. Hmm..Never thought about that before. Maybe after a bit of time has passed, the fear will subside and they will choose to be friends again. Don't shut them out for not understanding. Help them to understand and tell them what you may have needed from them at that time. Maybe that waym if they are ever faced with something like that agaun, they will respond in a more supportive manner. :hug:
  6. famous.last.words

    famous.last.words Forum Buddy

    hi hun,
    maybe its that he thinks he somehow was to blame for your attempt and he is scared of hurting you again, or maybe he loves you so much he didnt know how else to deal?
    Maybe like we were saying last night you could write him a letter back with exactly how you feel so you have the time to thing through exactly what your saying?

  7. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    When i was in hospital i told 2 of my friends - one came to see me which was nice of him, the other said she couldnt deal with it and not to tell her things about it as she didnt wanna know. So now - i dont tell anyone anything!
  8. malenka

    malenka Member

    It can't be nice for a friend to hear that he/she nearly lost you, and it was your choice. The way you don't understand why your friend is acting this way is same thing your friend doesn't understand why you acted the way you did. And it is anger, probably fueld by the fact that you didn't consider your friend as a friend to talk to before you attempted on taking your life.
    Your friend is hurting, same as you, but I do hope that things get better for you both soon.
    You two should talk and try and understand each other.
  9. riddle

    riddle Member

    When I overdosed, a couple of my friends came to see me. Even after another suicidal act my friends threw a we're glad you are alive party. It's gotten to the point where I am unable to not see that it will effect the people I love.
  10. White Dove

    White Dove Well-Known Member

    I was abandoned and still am..

    guess they think its okay to add more hurt by ignoring you????

    it does not help to ignore us, when we need others..to keep us alive.

    sorry your feeling badly...
  11. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    It is something that has been brushed under the carpet by everyone who knows - well the 3 people. I dont talk to my bf about it and never really did, he seemed to take it with a pinch of salt. My male friend well he just said if you need me you know where I am and the girlfriend it was never mentioned again. It is not worth me talking to anyone really so I have given up on it - oh my boyfriend did buy me a cat!!! So i have a suicide cat now - lol. I love him to bits though even though he pees everywhere. He stayed with the bf when I moved out though as I moved to a flat!
  12. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    I had very mixed experiences one close friend stuck right by my side and helped me a great deal infact im alive now becouse of her commitment to our friendship especially at that time, but then i had another friend whowasso cross and totally intolerant of it, my own sister didnt want to discuss it just was really off about it, one phone call was all i had, and i son was devestated and to this day im sure there is a part of him that cant forgive me, becouse in the eyes of a child if you choose to leave them, then do you love them? as an adult we can say most definately we do, but you try and tell that to your son or daughter when they are sat next to your hospital bed having had the paramedics come into your home when you were sleeping.

    I think there needs to be a lot more opportunity for friends and families to be involed in the healing process of a suicidal person as the last thing any of us need at a time like that is to then loose friends or family

  13. zRichi

    zRichi Member

    I had the same thing the second I attempted.

    The thing we've gotta remember is that to attempt your life like that is incredibly upsetting to those around us.

    Still it's pretty shitty.
  14. Samantha

    Samantha Well-Known Member

    Nobody wants to know you when your sick either physically or mentally or BOTH
    Believe I know your best friend is your Money.

    You will always have "friends" is you throw parties etc, lol

    Even going to a church I experienced distance etc.

    People generally maximise the take and minimise the give

    They are the tough rules of life.

    Having a pet dog or cat can make the difference.

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