About a monster *abuse triggers*

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by blackskies, Dec 7, 2010.

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  1. blackskies

    blackskies Member

    You took my respect along with my pride,
    You have not paid for the tears I have cried

    To you just a play toy, worth nothing more than a sick thrill
    Spat out, discarded you don’t even care
    You left me with nothing but a suicide pill

    Did you really believe what you were doing was ok?
    Did you truly think that what you were doing wasn’t a crime?
    I saw in your eyes, you had looked deep into your soul and didn’t see one single thing stray
    I often wonder whether you still believe the same and will for all of time.

    Were you and are you right? Am I the filthy and unclean one?
    Are you still a free man?
    Are you sorry for what you did, do you even wish that it could be undone?
    Have you done it to someone else?
    Someone innocent hurt because I’m a pathetic coward

    What you did still hurts so much it burns my soul
    If you knew would you care? Or think it’s a joke?
    Are you a monster? Or is the within monster me?

    I desperately want to cry and clean my soul
    But however much I try it won’t scrub clean.

    It’s damaged and rotten, no longer whole,
    It’s beyond repair now but still unseen.

    If you had to pay for what you did,
    ..........Maybe it could be fixed?
    Will I ever know whether blame lies with you?
    Or do I need to accept it has been me and always will be?

    I’m so scared the monster lies within me,
    Something disgusting, sick, dirty, evil....rotten to the core
    And this IS ALL my fault
    The monster towers above me.... it is slowly suffocates me
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I could not have expressed these emotions better but do realize the monster is NOT in you...it was his fault, his behavior and his to account for...you did nothing other than to be the weaker one...please know this and live your life for you...I have been there and I know the struggle very well...J
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