I made another attempt. It kinda started like all mine do. I was doing alright, except that I'm getting frustrated with the job search world and the fact that having little to no money was actually holding me back from finding work. Well, then I got in a fight with my roommate. And I couldn't make a phone call or go online for help, so my borderline started to kick in because I felt really alone and isolated and un-cared about and abandoned. And I started to cry... then I moved on to cutting myself... then threatening to take pills.... then I took about < Mod Edit - Specific Methods > and went to sit outside and wait. That's how it always happens with me: I cry, and if I get no help, I cut and if I get no help, I threaten suicide and if I get no help, I attempt suicide. A while later the police came by with an ambulance and took me to the hospital. I drank charcoal and stayed overnight. I fully expected the crisis center to (again) refuse to admit me, and I intended to, as soon as they let me out, go find an overpass and jump off of it right away. Well, they admitted me to the crisis center for a few days. Then my plan was to jump off of said overpass as soon as I got out but I did cool down and had an idea or two. Now I don't have anywhere in Oklahoma City to stay so I'm leaving on a wing and a prayer to stay with a friend in Corsicana TX. It's ironic; I can't get a job because I can't get stability but I can't get stability because I can't get a job. That's where my stress seems to come from lately; BPD just makes it that much worse.