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about me

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#1
hello, my name is Tanya, im 102 years old(at least thats what it feels like), I hate birthdays(whats the point to that.. what am i celebrating?, being born?, being alive?)...the good thign is.. i might be the older one in this forum!! so i win in that!! :stars:
i've been looking for a forum like this for a long time... specially when i was in my darkest times... im glad i found it now though... I used to be really happy and full of miles.. the gray days where then so scarse... Its over though i hardly smile... and when i do its an empty smile.. on an empy body.. one wich fills itself with obscure parts... its so hard to be prettendig these days specially since im cryign now.. almost everynight... i hate to see myself in the mirror... (the good part is... im a little beter now.. i used to cover them with whatever i could find... I coulnt even have the ourgae it takes.. when the pain is soo overwhelming... but i found some other ways... i did what i had to.. and now i wish i did not had... but really whats the point... i cant go back... i cant go there and tellmyself.. that thigns would be better... because i would be lying ....and i know i would be so much worse by now...
still it doesnt make me smile...
I lost my future.. and i wish i could foget many thing of my past...
I dont think ive ever been loved..., and i lost the interest in anyother thign there ever was...
i now wish i had a friend.. you kno wlike ones of those.. only few peopel are lucky to have...
....

mmm... al that sounds so pathetic... i think i should have gone for somethign better... likei always have...like:

Hello! my name i Tanya, i like to write and love to read and dance!
 
#3
Thanks for the welcome..
the site actually does... i signed in yesterday... 'one of those nights'... i did not feel soo alone... and... well letting it all out.. also helps!!... thank you!
 

Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#4
Hi Tanya and welcome...so glad you found us...there are so many of us who understand what it is like to hate to see ourselves, especially on the days/ nights when we are in the darkness...here you will find many ppl who can relate to what you have said and will be there for you...welcome again and I hope you find the support and caring you are seeking...J
 

Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#6
So glad you felt better...that means a lot to us...please keep me posted how you are doing...we are very glad to have you on board...and, btw...I am as old as dirt too...J
 
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