about to loose my job

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by OutCaste, Jun 13, 2012.

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  1. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    all because i cant mix with anyone

    everytime i have tried, i have been shoved away or ridiculed in some way.

    i simply dont have interest in what everyone else does, i try to do my job...isnt that enough ?
  2. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    if god is merciful, why has he allowed me to live and suffer humilation and ridicule everyday.

    the humiliation and ridicule just never, ever ends.
  3. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    maybe im not sincere enoguh to god.
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    WHy do you feel you cannot mix with everyone?
  5. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    something about me that makes nearly everyone dislike me after seeing me a few times.

    i have a lot of personality defects, anxiety, bad past etc. Even if I try to be nice, people misconstrue it.

    and im just not into things that most people like, so a lot of people take it as hostile behavior i guess.
  6. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Hmmm well just because people do not like you does not mean you are going to lose your job. If you have poor performance and stuff like or have plenty of documented incidents at work, that is a better indicator. I know how you feel about interests. I have found that tagging along can go a long way... at least that is what I have seen... maybe I am better at faking my way through things. However, it is best that you do not show any interest. Show you have an open mind and people will like you more. At least that is what I have seen. There are always boundries... but tagging along goes a long way.
  7. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    I think it's ridiculous how some employers expect you to be best buddies with all of your coworkers. It's like you said - isn't it enough to just be good at your job? Based on my experience, the friendliest people who get along with everyone are also usually the laziest workers. They spend more time "mixing" than they do working. They use their social charms as a substitute for their lack of skills and work ethic. The sad part is that society tends to reward this trait, as if being a likeable person is somehow more important than being productive and reliable. Look at it this way, though - if you lose your job over something like that, it was obviously a shitty place to work. I can't stand working for morons who value brownnosers over hard workers. They would be doing you a favor by letting you go in that case. And in my opinion, being let go when you didn't do anything wrong entitles you to unemployment benefits at the very least.
  8. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    If this is indeed the case, then you probably don't want to work there anyways. A job is a job and not a playground, so as long as you are performing your tasks and duties in accordance with established policies and procedure, the company has not grounds to remove you from employment. If they do, make sure you have documented everything you're stating here and make a presentation to the labor board or whatever government entity that oversees employment law and regulations where you live (and/or the unemployment office).

    In the employment world of my past, I have worked with people I didn't care for... and it had no bearing on my job or theirs. I didn't associate with them at lunch break or after work, but during working hours everything should be business as usual regardless if someone likes someone or not. I have also been involved in the hiring and firing of people in large corporations and I can tell you that if we ever released someone for the reasons you mention, we'd be hiding scared that we might be facing law suits. :)

    Be who you are, an individual, and don't change for anyone. Don't be rude or disruptive, of course, but the things you like, how you look, the way you present yourself, etc., should not be taken into account by an employer as you have described. Shame on them. As I said, I would personally look for another place to work if that is how they behave. Who needs em.
  9. OutCaste

    OutCaste Well-Known Member

    Let me explain the situation a bit better.

    Basically, we were having a team building event and it we had to play a certain sport. They made it mandatory and everyone had to participate or at least get to the event location and watch. Now I thought this was unfair as not everyone is the same and not everyone likes to play a sport. Also, how can you really build a team by playing games ? The contexts are totally different.

    This event location was almost an hour away from office.

    Now, my problem was that a) I'm fairly new in this country b) I've only been driving for a year c) Nobody was willing to give me a ride as no one likes me. So basically I had to drive to the location myself using a rented car in heavy rain and I was 20 min late because obviously I'm not yet well versed with the routes. Then I didn't really participate in the sport and chose to watch as I have arthritis in both of my legs and I don't like triggering it by doing physical tasks. Plus in the last few years, I've even had seizures/fainting when I get too tired.

    Now that's what ticked off my boss and he saw it as being disrespectful to other employees. When it was never my intention to piss anyone off, I'm just new to a lot of things and introverted by nature. I have gone out of my way several times to help people when they have asked me. Just so that they don't think I'm arrogant or think highly of myself.

    I'm in really hard situation because these employers have filed a work permit for me to work in this country. My old workplace was much much better even though I had a low pay and they were not willing to file a work permit for me. In this company, it just seemed like everyone disliked me from day 1.

    I've not been fired yet but I think its coming, its only another event or party away. I will behave in a manner that will be wierd and that would be it. I just can't help it. I can't even look people in the eye and say hello many times.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 13, 2012
  10. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    o_O you have not way to transport yourself and no one would transport you? Next time this happens put it on your boss. Go around the office, ask for rides. When everyone turns you down go to your boss and say you need a ride. Remember they lease your time they do not own you. If any work event happens outside of work hours you have no obligation to go. I explained this to the boss who could fire me at my last job. I told him he needed to remember that my time is my time. That if he is really being as benevolant as he thinks he is. He needs to schedule these events during regular office hours.

    Another thing, bring a doctors note. If your doctor says that it is not ok for you to play. Then it is not ok, and your boss has to repsect that. Otherwise you can file a complaint with labor departments. Even if you are not a native they have to look into the company.
  11. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    Forgotten Man is absolutely correct. Also, make sure you DOCUMENT everything. If you work for a large corporation, document the incidents and ask Human Resources to put them in your personnel file. Employees have almost more rights these days than do the employers. :)
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