abuse?

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by no point, Dec 18, 2010.

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  1. no point

    no point Well-Known Member

    my therapist said it's physical abuse. but i don't believe her. i just think it's unimportant. i'm mad at them at the same time. they're my family. why would they do that? a few months back, my sister said the reason i am/was so angry is because everyone was beating me all the time. most of the time there were no marks though. is it still abuse? i'm just so confused. i just want to stop thinkig about it. i want to stop being angry at them. i don't want to blame myself anymore. sorry i know i'm rambling but i'm just confused.
     
  2. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    It's difficult to accept that you have been/are being abused by people you are supposed to trust, like your family. It may take some time before you can see these events from other people's perspective. Keep speaking to your therapist about it, get their help with this.

    Just because there have been no visible marks doesn't mean it's not abuse. The marks are there, they're just invisible. It doesn't make it any less painful or damaging.

    I felt just the same when it was first suggested that I was abused. I refused to accept it at first, but I have gradually understood that the damage was internal. It took some time though, so give yourself a chance. No-one expects you to deal with this overnight.

    Mim
     
  3. Romancer

    Romancer Well-Known Member

    It is still abuse. and what they are doing is wrong.
    what you need to do though, is take care of yourself, any way you can.
     
  4. no point

    no point Well-Known Member

    thanks for the replies. i guess a part of me knows it's abuse but another part of me won't accept it because they are my parents. it was only for a couple of years, you know? it's not like it's going on. but my mind keeps playing it over and over again. my therapist says the reason i SI is because of this, mostly. i agree with her on this. most of the time, i just want to hurt myself before they hurt me if it makes sense. thanks again for the replies...
     
  5. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    That makes sense to me. If you're already hurting, they can't hurt you more, right? But you know that isn't healthy. Keep talking to your therapist about this, and get it all out. It won't go away overnight, but keep working through it and hopefully you'll find some peace within yourself.

    What they did was wrong, and it's hard to accept because they are your parents, they're supposed to love you and take care of you. But it hurts even more because of that.

    But you made it through. You survived, and you are a stronger person because of it. Don't forget that.

    Mim
     
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