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Abused by my brother and a cousin

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ashleyneedshope29

Well-Known Member
#1
Hi I was physically and sexually abused by my brother when I was six. He would come into my room at night until my stepdad put a lock on my door to stop it so he couldn't get in. I used to have night terrors and wet the bed. What hurts me is my mom chooses to have a relationship with him knowing what he did to me it's like a fuck you to me. When I was 14 my mother would go over to her sisters house and her son would tell me to get in the closet or his room or his sisters room anywhere that so he could sexually abuse me. I thought that this was normal because I had my brother do it to me. Well recently after telling my therapist I decided to write my aunt a letter when I told my mom she didn't believe me and wanted me to sweep it under the rug and not say anything. Shortly after she did apologize and I did write my aunt a letter telling her what her son did to me. It's been a few months and she hasent or won't respond which makes me think that she is in denial or she is just basicly a coward and her husband to because you can't act like nouthing happened and act like everything is rainbows and sunshine. I talked to my case manager yesterday about it and I told her that I wanted to confront my aunt so we could talk about it I'm not expecting anything all I want is a response from my aunt good or bad.
 

may71

Well-Known Member
#2
I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to demand a response from your aunt. Unfortunately people often like to sweep problems under the rug.
 

JDot

Well-Known Member
#4
I can imagine different reasons she wouldn't reply. She's probably scared. She doesn't want to believe that it's real. Unfortunately you don't have control over her. So a reply is something that just may never happen. The important thing is that you confronted her. That took a lot of courage. And I wish you the best as you recover from what happened.
 

sassy123

SF hugger
Staff member
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#5
Hugs Ashley so sorry you have had to deal with all of this. You are such a lovely person and I am so glad we have you. I hope you are given something from your aunt to help you move on from this or should I say given something to give you comfort. Hugs
 
#7
Wow that seems like a hard thing to deal with in your life. A similar situation happened to me when I was really young I was molested by a family friend and later an actual family member, my older brother. It only happened once and he was drunk at the time that's why I try not to think about it. It's like if I don't ever think about either event then I could pretend that it didn't happen to me but to someone else instead. Besides I knew early in life that no one would ever believe me or protect me. At least you were strong and told the truth no matter how much it hurt you. I can commend you for that. Would you be able to be around a family member after he did this and how? Because I still have to live with my brother as we both live with our mother, I already live behind a locked door but I don't have any means of support to move on my own, any advice on what to do?
 
#8
Wow that seems like a hard thing to deal with in your life. A similar situation happened to me when I was really young I was molested by a family friend and later an actual family member, my older brother. It only happened once and he was drunk at the time that's why I try not to think about it. It's like if I don't ever think about either event then I could pretend that it didn't happen to me but to someone else instead. Besides I knew early in life that no one would ever believe me or protect me. At least you were strong and told the truth no matter how much it hurt you. I can commend you for that. Would you be able to be around a family member after he did this and how? Because I still have to live with my brother as we both live with our mother, I already live behind a locked door but I don't have any means of support to move on my own, any advice on what to do?
Hi Sabrina I am truly sorry that you have been through this as well. You are so brave to talk about what happened to you I also command you for that because I know that it must still be hard to talk about. For me no I would not be around my abuser because the victim and the abuser do not need to be around each other period. There is no excuse for what your brother did to you sabrina. Have you tried to get on social security disability because that would help you get away if not then you could see if there are any shelters in your area. I am here if you need to talk you can pm me anytime you need to.
 
#9
Hi Sabrina I am truly sorry that you have been through this as well. You are so brave to talk about what happened to you I also command you for that because I know that it must still be hard to talk about. For me no I would not be around my abuser because the victim and the abuser do not need to be around each other period. There is no excuse for what your brother did to you sabrina. Have you tried to get on social security disability because that would help you get away if not then you could see if there are any shelters in your area. I am here if you need to talk you can pm me anytime you need to.
Hi Sabrina I am truly sorry that you have been through this as well. You are so brave to talk about what happened to you I also command you for that because I know that it must still be hard to talk about. For me no I would not be around my abuser because the victim and the abuser do not need to be around each other period. There is no excuse for what your brother did to you sabrina. Have you tried to get on social security disability because that would help you get away if not then you could see if there are any shelters in your area. I am here if you need to talk you can pm me anytime you need to.
Thank you, I did apply for SSI and hopefully I get approved because I just need more options that I simply don't have at the moment right now. I have moved out of my mom's house before but only to move in with another family member, even if I had the means to live alone, I'm not sure if I could live alone. Today my sister said that I should kill myself because I don't have anything to live for and I'm starting to think that she's right about that. I have no job, no man, no kids, I don't even have my own place and I'm always in pain, what am I living for?
 

sassy123

SF hugger
Staff member
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#10
Thank you, I did apply for SSI and hopefully I get approved because I just need more options that I simply don't have at the moment right now. I have moved out of my mom's house before but only to move in with another family member, even if I had the means to live alone, I'm not sure if I could live alone. Today my sister said that I should kill myself because I don't have anything to live for and I'm starting to think that she's right about that. I have no job, no man, no kids, I don't even have my own place and I'm always in pain, what am I living for?
Sabrina your sister is wrong you should live prove her wrong you have hope what she is saying is so wrong please stay strong hugs. All this stuff can come in time.
 
#12
Thank you, I did apply for SSI and hopefully I get approved because I just need more options that I simply don't have at the moment right now. I have moved out of my mom's house before but only to move in with another family member, even if I had the means to live alone, I'm not sure if I could live alone. Today my sister said that I should kill myself because I don't have anything to live for and I'm starting to think that she's right about that. I have no job, no man, no kids, I don't even have my own place and I'm always in pain, what am I living for?
Why the hell listen to your sister tho. Why let others dictate your life gurl??? Tell her to fuck off. Wth telling another sibling such horrendous stuff?? I'm just mad. Dont bother about her seriously u need to level up and train your eyes and meet good people. Stay away from them. It's so fcked up. I'd rather be alone and enjoy hobbies than to be with a sister or family like that. Please love yourself more girl. Rooting for you.
 
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