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Abusive Relationships

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Youlleatamuffinandlikeit, Oct 27, 2010.

  1. Youlleatamuffinandlikeit

    Youlleatamuffinandlikeit Well-Known Member


    Has anyone else had just the worst time of their life getting over an ex who was abusive?

    I mean, it should be simple and easy to rid your life and your heart of someone so disrespectful who hurts you in every conceivable way. Someone so profoundly selfish, who did everything within their power to destroy you and make you into little more than their emotional punchbag.

    And yet...unless you've been there, I don't think people realise the power a manipulative person can have over you.

    And then, of course, there is the problem of *love*. Cursed emotion wasted on someone who isn't even capable of it.

    The feelings are complex, people stay and leave for a whole number of reasons. For me, it was survival. If I didn't walk away when I did, there wouldn't be a Muffin anymore.

    I have been through hell and back to get over him this year and finally I can feel my power returning. I wonder though, will that aching, that deep-seated tender agony in the pit of your soul, does it ever go away? :/

    What have been people's experiences?
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Ithink it will take time to trust again i think you have to move ahead cautiously not making the same mistakes as before falling into same relationships over again but if you do find that right one that shows you there is another way a kinder way of living then you will forget the past pain I hope you do walk away and keep walking and find that gentle person who will treat you with respect and care
  3. yous

    yous Well-Known Member

    I think anytime you devote an enormous amount of energy, time, and effort to make something work or fixing something(like hoping he will change), can put a toil on a person. We don't like to give up on "projects" we believed in especially something so strongly. The fact this guy was a jerk to you, doesn't even care about you is not worth your time to dwell over. You are dwelling over what could have been, what you may have hoped it could be, and that part of you wishes or tries to justify that. Time will heal and its time to look for someone better.
  4. BP#1

    BP#1 Well-Known Member