Admitting to those that are close to me that I been struggling with depression still and with suicidal thoughts is hard. I finally came open this morning about it to my husband. Just exhausted emotionallyand physically on dealing with this problem of mine. It's gone on far to long and I feel trapped and hopeless things will get better on it. Most of my life has been dealing with this problem of mine - not just the depression and suicidal thoughts but the eating disorder as well. Why must this continue? It's taken my life away. I have no hope. I wish I did. Just saddens my heart.