Adult confrontation.

Discussion in 'Bullying and Violence' started by Mightbehere, Nov 5, 2008.

?

See Below

  1. Yes

    11 vote(s)
    32.4%
  2. No

    23 vote(s)
    67.6%
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  1. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    Heres an interesting poll I have been thinking about. If you suffered serere bullying as a child or teenager and you still have scares about it do you think you should contact the 'bully' now that your older and tell him how it messed up your life? Or do you think it might make it worse I know it would depend on many things and have the potential to backfire.
     
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I don't think that confronting him as an adult would do much good. I mean what would you tell him. Hey, you pretty much fucked up my life for good, I just wanted you to know that? It would be much more satisfying to destroy his life instead, assuming you know where he lives etc. Make them suffer a little.
     
  3. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    It depends on the circumstances, scenario and state of the person's mind.
     
  4. raincloud

    raincloud Well-Known Member

    I don't want to give any of them the satisfaction of knowing what they did to me. After all, they were TRYING to ruin me. It would just make them happy to know they succeeded beyond their dreams.
     
  5. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    People who bully others when they're children continue to do so as adults. I think there is a growing advocacy against bullying. You may want to do a web search. Perhaps fighting it on the legislative front will give you some relief even if the extent of your involvement were limited to donations.

    :hug:
     
  6. raincloud

    raincloud Well-Known Member

    I was watching a talk show on daytime TV once (I think it was Montel but I really don't remember --this was years ago) and the show featured adults who had been bullied as children and teenagers and they confronted their bullies. They bullies were called to the show without even knowing why they were there. When asked about the kids they bullied, most of them only had vague recollections of the person they bullied, and none expressed remorse. They mostly said things like "Oh, yeah, I remember that loser." Stupid bullies.
     
  7. Trance

    Trance Well-Known Member

    Well even though i was the bully...instead of being the one bullied i don't see how a meeting between the two would help in anyway unless the bully is like me.

    I long desperately to get in touch with the people i bullied and apologize a thousand times over even though i know that wont take it back v.v
     
  8. NoGood

    NoGood Well-Known Member

    would you need it for some sort of clousure??

    I wouldnt contact them. What I would do and im half way through doing is: Go through life trying to be the best that you can possibly be. The bully, well in my case anyway, will be stuck in a rut, going nowhere, in a company where they have no authority and get bossed around themselves instead of being the boss. All the while, im trying to reach my full potential, futhering my education, travelling the world, having lucky breaks with great jobs, having a nice car, a great boyfriend and on the outside looking as happy as happy can be. I just have one more thing to do and thats to get a knock out body so im working towards that.

    Bully jealous of victim = clousure for me haha
     
  9. Mikeintx

    Mikeintx Well-Known Member

    Most of the time the one bullying has a messed up family situation anyhow... I mean how good of parents can the kid have if he is being violent to people at a young age?
     
  10. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    I once confronted a bully from high school many years later, when I was much bigger than he was. He was working at a super market and I asked him if he remembered. Maybe it was it was because he was frightened that I might do something or maybe it was because he was at work at the time but he denied everything. I still told him off in front of a bunch of customers.

    But, I would be careful confronting anyone like that at home as they are most likely still violent. Maybe if you could get a phone number and tell them off by phone I think it might be worth it just to let them know the damage they inflicted and to regain some control over them that you didn't have when it happened.
     
  11. Vangelis

    Vangelis Well-Known Member

    My bully in my life was my brother...he bullied me from the day I was born, he grew up got married...everything was happy happy while I suffered on the other side of the USA, until one day he caught his wife cheating on him and now he lives a lonely life somewhere in texas. Karma at it's best.
     
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