Advice for an odd situation.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by xZombiexAngelx, Jun 20, 2011.

  1. xZombiexAngelx

    xZombiexAngelx Well-Known Member

    There was this guy I dated for 2 years. We were off and on most of the time. But we really did love eachother. A couple months ago, he killed himself cause of me. I was cutting again, and I blamed him for everything, then right after he killed himself. It's been extremely tough on me. Not many of my friends have been too supportive, they all hated him. He didn't treat me the best, but it's still been hard on me. Anyway, there's this one guy I've known for a few months, and talking to him sort of makes the bad stuff disappear.

    But my problem is... I think I like this new guy. But, I'm afraid to like him. I feel like I'd be replacing my ex... And when I think of that, it makes me want to cry. If I replace my ex, I'd feel like I let him down. It's my fault he's dead, so it makes me feel so bad. I dunno how else to explain. I guess I'm scared that I'll fall in love with this new guy and forget my ex.

    Any advice?
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    No way are you responsible for his death, he was obviously in a bad place and decided to take this route.
    You did not hold a gun to his head, make him OD, or whatever.
    Yes the break up may have been the straw that broke the camel's back, but there must have been a lot more going on with this guy, or this forum would be full of dead people, given how many of us ended up here over a break up!

    As to the new guy, well unless you are thinking of taking the veil, this is going to come up at some point.
    It may be that you still feel raw from the last relationship, so honestly, I'd take this one slow.
    Get to know this guy properly, sexual attraction is one thing, but actually liking the person takes time; you need to get to know them.
    Then, if it feels this could be something serious, go for it.
    I'm sure your ex wouldnt want you to be alone for the rest of your life.

    Good luck and don't fear getting those toes wet! :hug:
  3. xZombiexAngelx

    xZombiexAngelx Well-Known Member

    Thank you :)

    I just feel really responsible. Not just because of the break up. But because he was asking for my help. His best friend died in an accident, and he came to me for help. But instead of offering comforting words, I shoved all this crap at him. That's why I feel like it's my fault, mainly.

    Also, I usually do take my time getting to know somebody before deciding anything. But for some reason, it's different this time. It's like I've subconsciously fallen for him. Not the normal type either - it's like I've fallen flat on my face and I have absolutely no clue what I'm supposed to do.
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    That happens rarely, it means there's chemistry and if you get together FIREWORKS!!!
  5. xZombiexAngelx

    xZombiexAngelx Well-Known Member

    There is definitely chemistry :)
    Even my friends can see it

    It'd be nice to feel fireworks again <3
    I had the fireworks with my ex, and I gotta say, I miss it

    Thanks for responding. Really means a lot :hug: