Advice request - coping, at least temporarily?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by roflmywaffl, Jun 5, 2012.

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  1. roflmywaffl

    roflmywaffl Guest

    Hi guys,

    new to SF and in crisis mode, sort of. Perhaps not as badly as some here at the moment, because my current mood is one of blankness and resignation rather than an emotional hurricane, and I don't mean to offend anyone else here that may have more pressing feelings, but I'm really hoping someone here has a practical idea or two.

    Ending it isn't an option for the moment - not that you guys would recommend it, I'm sure - but despite "unfinished business" (I have a young child that hasn't fully been made arrangements for yet) the urge is incredibly hard to resist. I'm sure the next "emotional hurricane" isn't far off, either.

    I've tried the crisis hotline, their advice (observation in a hospital) isn't feasible, for the same abovementioned reason (no family nearby to babysit, and new area, no acquaintances yet).

    The reason for all this is a lost love - I know, I know, it's so cliché it makes you gag. But I met him at a time when I was on the brink of letting go, and he "saved" me - as it turns out, I was never really "cured, as having lost him brings me back to where I was before him, and worse. In my mind he's the equivalent of "home" and the only real connection I've felt / the only place I belong / the only thing that made the rest of life worth putting up with.

    So, given all this, what would you do? What takes your mind off things for a while? What thought process rationalizes a loss in a way that makes it more bearable? Are any of your coping mechanisms tied to other people? What would you do if those people were no longer there?

    Any thoughts and experiences on those subjects would be so very much appreciated.

    Hope you're all having a relatively good day.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Well hun you put all your focus on that child and you feel that child love and you see that childs smile ok YOu found someone once you can find someone again one YOU are stable enough
  3. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    ^ exactly.
    Our children are a part of us... not just a responsibility, but they are the actual essence of what we are. With a young child, you have so much to go on for all the time. Even if you feel that things are hopeless, perhaps even all the more reason to work hard to try to ensure that your child has a future full of wellness. It's difficult to have loss, and it never helps when someone says another will come along... but the fact of it is that it's usually true. In the meantime, your child doesn't want arrangements to be taken care of elsewhere, they want mom always and forever. Hang tight and try hard, hard as it may be. We've all got demons chomping away trying to break us... but we all have to beat them and win.
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