Advice to feeling better about oneself?

Discussion in 'Appearance and Body Image (New Forum)' started by Dikta, Oct 18, 2016 at 11:29 PM.

  1. Dikta

    Dikta Autistic.

    Yeah. Sorry if the title is a bit long.
    I know many others than just me suffers from seeing oneself differently than others.

    But I want to stop that, if it's possible.

    So I just want to ask, if anyone who has ever seen themselves as something negative turned their point of view and now likes themselves.
    I hope it makes sense.

    I'm just tired of feeling disgusting and see myself as overweight, when people tell me I'm not. And I truly want to believe them. But I just can't seem to.
    I know I'm not thin, but I do want to feel good about myself as I am.

    So I just hope others with the same issue or who had the same issue, might have any advice on how to change the way one looks at itself.
  2. Cicada 3301

    Cicada 3301 Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Title is fine. It doesn't matter what other people say about your image if you can't change your own view right? Here other people are saying you are not overweight or disguisting, but you feel you are. One of those can be quite easily checked by visiting your doctor, the other is more to do with what you see in yourself as a person.

    I had the same two issues not too long ago and you asked if I had any advice so I will answer. I think you need to do a number of things: first see your doctor to find out your weight and whether you are within a healthy BMI range. Whatever the result, you can work to reduce your weight to a point you are happy, if you are not currently. You can speak to your doctor about how to do this and they can refer you if you are struggling or you can also learn online, there are many resources I used online to help me with my weight loss. I knew I would not be happy with my weight so I took it upon myself to lose some, this has given me more confidence and I feel a desire and strength to do more things in life now.

    Second, you need to talk with someone, ideally a professional who can help you through these negative thoughts you are having about yourself. Self-deprecation can be good sometimes for a laugh or to bring us back down to Earth but too much can be dangerous especially when coupled with depression or suicidal thoughts. I really think it is important for you to flesh out these thoughts with someone else or seriously work on them yourself because it can cause a lot of permanent issues otherwise. You need to start learning to treat yourself better and the ways to do that are by building your own confidence and self-esteem, seeing someone about the thoughts and also being nicer to yourself.

    I have been through what you are and I still am to some degree, it is not an easy thing to do and it takes a hell of a lot of work but you have the strength and resilience to work through these issues and change your view of yourself because it is not fair to you. Remember that you will have set backs through this journey but you must stay on your feet. Good luck, and send me a message if you want to ask any questions.
    Freya and Inanimate like this.
  3. Dikta

    Dikta Autistic.

    Thank you. And it's been years since I got a bmi thing, and back then it was fine.
    And last I spoke to my doctor about a concern regarding my legs, he said it was just me thinking like that.
    So it did open my eyes a bit at least, although I have for years struggled with how it is. And it has gone up and down of course. At the moment it's just way down due to stress caused by a family member, so hopefully after that, it'll be easier to see results and such, when it'll show.

    And I will look into it, thank you for your advice.
    Cicada 3301 likes this.