Just hang on and see what happens, to indulge your curiosity. Life is a story - and you are the narrative. Life is something that happens to us, rather than something we steer along a road (that's just the illusion of free will). So, sit tight and watch the movie a while longer. After all, if it's so bad you're gunna kill yourself, how much worse can things honestly get ? Surely, things can only get better. It may help to look on it as a test of your mettle. Afterwards, you can say "I survived that test, so bring it on ... " And for sure, life will continue to throw test after test at you. That's the price of the spectacular thing we're all experiencing - never undervalue it. Remember : - diamonds are forged under great pressure.