Afraid and Anxious--Please Talk to Me

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by vhanna26, Dec 2, 2012.

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  1. vhanna26

    vhanna26 Active Member

    I was fired from a job last month. Even though I had been a good and reliable employee, I was given a new project and had a subpar 3 months because the project was too difficult and my goals were too set way too high. I complained, but was ignored. and I saw it coming.

    I tried to get another job before my firing, but couldn't, and I've been looking since. The unemployment benefits are being disputed and I won't know anything for a couple of weeks about that. My husband works, but he doesn't make enough to cover all the bills. Right now, I'm afraid of being evicted, losing transportation, etc.

    I had a meltdown Friday night and wanted to kill myself. I've been having terrible anxiety attacks; my appetite is gone; I've lost interest in my hobbies, and I haven't told my friends. I probably would have taken some OTC pills, but in my reading I found out that it usually isn't that effective and that I would end up with more problems. Jumping from a nearby bridge would be more effective, but I simply don't have the courage for it now.

    I've called the helplines, and they really haven't been helpful. They just want me to go to the hospital, when I really just need to talk to someone. My husband has been good and kind, but when I talk of suicide, it scares him.

    I have this month's rent, and my husband can take care of some bills, but we need help. I know I will get scared again tomorrow night because the work week starts again and I need to start my job search again.

    I just need to chat with someone. I know that you cannot solve my problems, but maybe give me some perspective. Thanks
  2. Oceans

    Oceans Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry to hear that you have lost your job and the strain of having to deal with the up-coming bills. A job provided security in paying the bills you needed and now that is gone. Please know you're in a difficult circumstance, and that is what it is, a circumstance, it will hopefully pass when you have a job again. I know it may not feel like it at the moment but please hang in there. From the sounds of it, this is a really difficult and rough time for you. It is really hard but it isn't for ever although it feels like right now. Your husband sounds supportive and caring person, hang in there together while you both try and get pass this circumstance. Be kind to yourself and start the job search again. Keep talking to us, we're here to listen.
  3. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Hi.... That's a lot of worries for you. I wonder if you could try to tackle each day rather than looking and thinking about everything as one big overwhelming ball?

    You can always appeal the unemployment decision, just try to ensure (if the decision is negative) that you know why and understand why it was denied. Then your appeal needs to reflect that fact.

    You could also talk with your debtors, if it comes to that point, about payment plans and similar.

    Are there any seasonal jobs around that would keep you going for right now while you look for openings in your field?

    There are always options, even when things feel so dark. Don't give up. I'm glad you called hotlines, some ppl can be more helpful than others so don't rule that out. I wonder also if you would look into talking with a therapist or similar. Many will help out with fees if they know your situation.

    You can and will get through this, take care of yourself.
  4. vhanna26

    vhanna26 Active Member

    Thanks. I also need the courage to ask to help. Friday night scared me. I don't want to die, I just don't like feeling so scared and that there isn't a way out.
  5. vhanna26

    vhanna26 Active Member


    I've been thinking about calling some debtors to see what can be done. I'm still looking for work. The unemployment office took interviews from me and the former job, and sent the results to an arbitrator, so I will know of their decision in a couple of weeks.

    Friday night scared me because it was the first time that I would have done something--taken pills--if I knew it could work.

    I can't afford a therapist, but will try again on Monday to see if there is someone I can speak to.
  6. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Look into what programs may be available to help and keep talking to us here. Feel free to stop by the chatroom if you want to talk as well or PM me anytime and I will be happy to talk to you. It is dark now, but it is not hopeless at all and you can get through it.

    Take Care and Be Safe

  7. vhanna26

    vhanna26 Active Member

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