i called a suicide prevention hotline because i really needed someone to talk to and it was so late at night so i couldnt talk to any friends. it was nervewracking making a phone call in the first place and when they picked up they sounded bored out of their mind. they didnt want to be there or talk to me and it seemed like they didnt care either. i had a panic attack and hung up and honestly im afraid to call a hotline again. it makes me so angry. i thought they were there to listen to me but they didnt even want that.