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Again and again

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Theone, Jun 9, 2010.

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  1. Theone

    Theone Well-Known Member

    Reading Sundays diary entry (diary CNP's idea) ..., feeling really ashamed and pathetic... It's weird even when I'm not that down still don't want to go on really, it's all... Blah... I'm sitting oposite one of my best friends in the world and all I want to do is tell her how much she means to me then end it all..... Why why why!
    I really can't be bothered... Life only has the importance that we place on it and seing as I don't place any on mine it seems pointless.... No one will say it's ok to end it, is always there's everything to live on but why can't I just have freedom, freedom at last.... I'm not being melodramatic just all seems like shit to me.... I FUCKING HATE IT*
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    there must be something about living that makes you happy A childs laughter
    exploring the world outside you world Camping hiking sports arts something that brings a spark into your life. If not then time to talk to your doctor because your depression is not under control your depression is controlling you
    want freedom then get help and get feeling better so you can take control and do the things that will bring life back into you. Who know sky diving bungee jumping anything but sitting and thinking get out and do something okay
    lst step call GP or psych doctor and say things are not any better need med change needmore councelling get help for you okay life doesn not have to be the way it is. take care
  3. shadowheart

    shadowheart Well-Known Member

    violet....i dont think that i could disagree with you more...
    going bushwalking or camping isn't going to give reason to Theone's life....
    you say find the spark and do stuff that you enjoy to make yourself feel happier...but it is simply not that easy...i can personally relate to what this feels like...nothing is worth it....life is pointless...and the people around you...as much as you love them...you just want to let go....
    Theone....i hope you are okay.
    and...that you can find something or someone to give you reason....
    pm me if you feel like it.
  4. Theone

    Theone Well-Known Member

    thank you both for your replies, your advice is helpful but im not sure what im going to do..... thank you anyway
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