age and depression

[oscilate]

One idea that drives my suicidal thoughts is that I'm going to be like this the rest of my life if I don't go through with it. I know a lot of people who have been like this for decades, and I can't imagine being able to cope with feeling alone for that long.

One of my favorite musicians is Elliott Smith, who killed himself in his 30's after receiving the best possible treatment money can buy. I often think about how throughout his entire life he must have suffered through depression before finally taking that route.

I know it seems kind of juvenile to try and relate myself to some musician, but I was just wondering if your ability to cope gets easier with time. I understand this is a pro-life forum and you may feel that the only way to help a young person like me is to tell me the most hopeful answer, but please don't. I just want your honest opinion. Maybe I should rephrase the question to be more specific to your own individual experiences, rather than ask if overall it can or cant get better.

 

[LetItGo]

One idea that drives my suicidal thoughts is that I'm going to be like this the rest of my life if I don't go through with it. I know a lot of people who have been like this for decades, and I can't imagine being able to cope with feeling alone for that long.

One of my favorite musicians is Elliott Smith, who killed himself in his 30's after receiving the best possible treatment money can buy. I often think about how throughout his entire life he must have suffered through depression before finally taking that route.

I know it seems kind of juvenile to try and relate myself to some musician, but I was just wondering if your ability to cope gets easier with time. I understand this is a pro-life forum and you may feel that the only way to help a young person like me is to tell me the most hopeful answer, but please don't. I just want your honest opinion. Maybe I should rephrase the question to be more specific to your own individual experiences, rather than ask if overall it can or cant get better.

Its surprising just how long you can go through life feeling this way, for me its been in a couple of large cycles, through late primary school and early high school, a reprieve for a few years, and then again after university till this present day.

For some people it only lasts a few months, for others it lasts a lifetime. The most important thing to do is recognize your not well and actively try to get better, if you do that, chances are you wont have to suffer this way for the rest of your life. If you give up, it will last forever.

 

[diver200]

:mellow:I often wonder how i've made it so long. we are talking about 35 years. i do fear that one day, on an impulse, i'll carry out my death wish. i guess this brings "one day at a time" to a new level to my AA path. . . .

 

[nimbus]

i know this thread is pretty old but i saw a new post by you and was reading older posts and here we are.

so i've been through several big cycles in my life as well. in jr hi and hs i spent most of my time feeling unable to cope. after leaving the town i grew up in, things got a little better for a while.

in my mid 20's i went through a major depression. mostly because i was coming to grips with the fact that i'm gay. after i came to grips (mostly) with that things got better for a while. it wasn't always great but at least it was bearable.

now, in my late 30's my world is coming apart again. i won't bore you with details but i'm just not doing very well these days.

so all that to say, things do go in cycles. i'm glad i didn't succeed in leaving earlier in life. there is a lot that i would have missed out on. maybe it's dumb to think this but i hate to see when younger people commit. i'd give anything to be able to go back and relive my life from that age. but i guess we're all stuck in worlds of our own design.

i'll leave you with something i think you'll like:

Situations get fucked up and turned around sooner or later
I could be another fool or an exception to the rule
You tell me the morning after

those words actually brought me comfort back in my 20's, i hope they offer you something now.

 

[Bonifide C]

One idea that drives my suicidal thoughts is that I'm going to be like this the rest of my life if I don't go through with it. I know a lot of people who have been like this for decades, and I can't imagine being able to cope with feeling alone for that long.

One of my favorite musicians is Elliott Smith, who killed himself in his 30's after receiving the best possible treatment money can buy. I often think about how throughout his entire life he must have suffered through depression before finally taking that route.

I know it seems kind of juvenile to try and relate myself to some musician, but I was just wondering if your ability to cope gets easier with time. I understand this is a pro-life forum and you may feel that the only way to help a young person like me is to tell me the most hopeful answer, but please don't. I just want your honest opinion. Maybe I should rephrase the question to be more specific to your own individual experiences, rather than ask if overall it can or cant get better.

I guess I'm one of those once in a decade people:ohmy:

I think once you continue to age, your depression may be less worst. Perhaps because you already seen everything bad, that nothing can really surprise you anymore. However a meaningful relationship has the possibility of changing things around, depending on how strong the relationship is. I can't speak on the behalf of everyone but myself, and there hasn't been any significant change in my life that would make me think otherwise. I been in this rug for years.

That is my honest opinion.

But remember all hope is lost when you give up hope.