I am all alone. and I do not do well in chatrooms. For me, they are a set up for feeling more alone. I live all alone. Am pretty much agoraphobic. I was barely hanging on but at least I could get out of the house to go to my therapist. And to do a bit of shopping. But the therapist dropped me when I got on disability and medicare. Not covered by medcare. So I am all alone now. No one. Growing more depressed and anxiety ridden each day. I go from panic attacks to depression. So I know what deep isolation and shame and dispair and desperation feels like. Therapist dropping me was "the straw that broke the camels back. I go from panic attacks to depression. last night it was panic attacks that kept me awake until 6 in the morning. today its deep depression. I have never felt this bad before. Losing the therapist was the last straw. I cannot trust enough to find another one. I am too fragile, weak and worn down. Dont have anymore fight in me. but I do not want to be so alone. I want someone to talk with on the phone or in chat. Pray to God every day to help this body to die. Still too scared to do it myself. But I am working on trying to desensitize myself to the fear of doing it myself. Got all of the matreials. But have to just work on the fear of the process. thank you for listening.