Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by visions of the past, Oct 3, 2009.

  1. holy cow, I have been so angry today.
    my buddy in canada that i know over xbox live talked me into purchasing nhl09, which i though would cheer me up, perhaps spark back up the passion i once had for video games, but i just cannot do it anymore. everytime i play video games i feel like chucking my xbox out of my window and punching my television set. i have been so angry lately, and have been suppressing it, which i know is not good, but i have no way to vent because my parents would begin to freak out, and i don't want to upset them, but at the same time, i am tired of the 'do as we say, not as we do' spiel. I am 19 for christ's sakes! do i even have to put up with this nonsense? but where else would i be able to go? i have to stay there, at least for the time being. i dropped out of school because i realized that that institution has been depressing me, making me think that i am not good enough and that i need to strive and strive and keep f***ing striving! F**K THAT! i am tired of it. now my ma keeps getting on me about things that need to not be rushed. i hate rushing into things. i have done that too much, and am tired of it. and i feel like shit because i got angry at my canadian friend because of my shit mood, and i apologized to him for that, but it is hard to keep myself from getting so angry because i can be a very literal person, which tends to bring down the mood when i am around people, which in turn, depresses me further because i feel like a nuisance. GAAAH! it felt good to get that little bit of irrelevant information off of my chest.
  2. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I am glad that you posted here to get that out. 19 is a great age. Being under your parents roof has its challenges.

    Can you go to adult education to get your diploma? The environment is much easier to be in. That would put you on a path to supporting yourself and getting your own place.

  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    It sounds as if you definitely have depression and maybe irrational thoughts and mood swings..You can get meds to help with these.. I know because I am on them.. I can tell the difference when I go off them.. I agree with Chargette that you could take night classes to get your diploma..You will need it in the future if you want a decent job.. The days of drop outs are over.. Now adays you have college graduates who can't find work so they are taking what they can get.. So the competition is feirce..Please see a doctor about getting on the meds..Keep in mind most phsyc meds take six to eight weeks to start working..You won't feel anything except maybe a side effect and they can switch you to another med..