all i can ask is why?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Kye, Jun 7, 2010.

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  1. Kye

    Kye Member

    hello everyone, I sure do hope this is posted in the right place....

    I find myself asking "why?" all the time. Why? is my life so utterly rubbish that every one i meet or cross in the street feels the need to look down there nose at me, pass snide coments or judge on what other people have told them. all i do all day every day is try to make my so called friends and family happy thats all i want yet they to find the need to make feel an inch and a half tall. i fight with them every problem they have help them with anything they ask and more yet when it comes to me asking for help or support of even just a phone call to help me talk things through no one is intrested :(. am i being selfish? should i be grateful that i have given happieness to my freinds? I just dont know any more i really don't im beging to wonder if they would notice if i dissapeard x
     
  2. lbc213

    lbc213 Member

    may I ask how old you are? u sound young and imo lots of people at your age feel that way, just get along with life, find the pleasant things you get on with and thing about your future
     
  3. Kye

    Kye Member

    you can ask anything you like i have nothing to hide from any one, i'm twenty and already i feel the need to give up is greater than the one to carry on, maybe a little attention or notice from my freinds to see that i am struggling with my own problems and for them to help me or maybe I'm asking to much? x
     
  4. lbc213

    lbc213 Member

    im close to your age but to me friends are different, they seem to understand but dont. I'm disappointed in my family to be honest. I was struggling and right now going down and nobody is helping or supporting me.
     
  5. Kye

    Kye Member

    much like yourself family have been of no help to me, they seem to think this is all a game, it begs the question who would think this is a game? certainly not me..... if your freinds will listen would you explain to them all that your feeling? if so it may help? and what about here do you have support here? x
     
  6. lbc213

    lbc213 Member

    on here I spoke with somebody, on aim or msn, they were a social worker etc I could tell and they confirmed it but it was about a month ago, it felt good but I was out of it at the time but after a month my feelings and situation came back at me. My friends, well especially my closest friend thinks to himself he has the same situation but nowhere close. Recently I have somehow been addicted to alcohol, since it makes me feel a bit better n in a lighter mood and forget some things but I think to myself im only fkn 21, just turned 21 in fact. My dad has been a bit aswell but things have gotten a bit far. I feel I'm turning too old for my age.
     
  7. lbc213

    lbc213 Member

    just turned 21 and already addicted to alcohol a joke right?
     
  8. Kye

    Kye Member

    well you can talk to me whenever you like... maybe you should explain to your freind that what your feeling is more that what he understands and that for you to get though it you are going to need his support and your other freinds support....... alcohol is not the answer as much as i do want to end my life (hence why im here) i have never thought of using acohol i really dont see the attraction? my flaw would be my car when im mad i think about ending it in that :( and turning to old for your age people mature at different levels there is no wrong or right age at wich you should have these or other feelings x
     
  9. Kye

    Kye Member

    its not a joke and its a problem that can be resolved x
     
  10. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    When did you start drinking?
     
  11. confusedgirl

    confusedgirl Well-Known Member

    hey kye I totally understand you on that one! My car is my little think pod, I find myself driving dangerously and really don't care I hope that someone will just crash into me n it would all be over! X
     
  12. Kye

    Kye Member

    Thank you confused girl, I'm glad I'm not alone in this feeling. But wheat scares. Me the most I think is more the fact I will be destroting some one else and some one elses family when really all I want to do is hurt myself? X
     
  13. confusedgirl

    confusedgirl Well-Known Member

    I Have thought many many times and had loads of sleepless nights about that too, you never know whos gonna be around that corner, that frightens me lots! take car Hun n drive safely! X
     
  14. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Kye,
    Have you tried therapy.. They can teach you coping skills..And Cognitive Distortions..I have found mine to be great support.. I have been seeing her for five years..
    It will give you support and you will be taken seriously..You can't always count on friends..Take care!!
     
  15. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    I have to completly agree with this, you can rely on friends so much and if they can support you that is great. But the best way is getting someone professional who can be there and support you, even if it is scary it is always worth a try.

    Look after yourself

    Rich
     
  16. Kye

    Kye Member

    Thank you guys, im going to call the Dr in the morning and ask for some help, its just hard to admit to some one face to face what your feeling, any advice? x
     
  17. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Best trick is to write it down, then the doctor will be able to ask you the right questions based on what you have written, just be honest and open. They will ask what you would like to do, so best think about what you want out of it.

    I wish you so much luck okay, I hope it goes okay for you

    Rich

    :hug:
     
  18. Kye

    Kye Member

    Thank you so much Rich that means alot for you just to say that, i will spend tonight trying to write my feelings down in words, but all i want out of it is to be happy to stop this feeling that i want to end all that i am and that i have
     
  19. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Please keep us posted and let us now how it goes :hug:
     
  20. Kye

    Kye Member

    i will ofcorse keep this thread going with everything that happens,
     
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